Philosophy In A Teacup
by DarkWolf423
Summary: Edward never came back after chapter three of New Moon. Ten years later, Bella and Edward have a chance encounter when she goes on vacation with her family. Not your typical 'what if' Cannon Pairings JacobxB Poll for final pairing. JacobxB or ExB?
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT. We all know this. Sadly :( **

**A/N: If you review I'll update faster :-) This is my first fic. So please flame me gently. . **

**Beta Reader: berryblue100**

**EPOV**

Ten years. Ten, long, exhausting years. My family had forgiven me for the most part. They knew what my intentions were. If they didn't, they'd have never uprooted and moved simply because I asked them to. Her safety, her happiness, was all that mattered and all my actions were made with her in mind. My angel, my Bella, could live life like a normal human. I knew her heart would break from my decision. But it'd heal. I knew it would heal. My Bella was strong enough to move on. She had more strength than I'd ever possess. In time, when she was married with children, maybe even grandchildren, she'd thank me. She would never have those things if she was with me.

The day I left was the single most painful day of my existence. After I had met her, for the first time in more than eighty years, my dead heart had learned to beat again. I never knew anything was missing in my life. Not until she turned my world upside down. She had streaked across the night sky that was my life. I could see the heavens with her. Jump, she'd say. 'How high?' would be my response. God, she was amazing. She was my everything… and still is. No amount of time could change the way I feel about her. She completed me, and that day, I ripped my still beating heart out of my chest. It was the best thing I could do for her. For me, short of her dying, it was the worst.

Not a second passed that I didn't think of her or wonder how she was doing. Several times I almost went back to Forks to beg for her forgiveness. But I refused to let her suffer from my weakness. My world could only give her death or eternal damnation and she deserved neither. So, I went to South America to find that bitch of a vampire. But it was as if she had never existed, the exact same thing I had told Bella. Apparently, we were good at that, good at disappearing.

For most of the last decade, I stayed away from my family, unable to deal with their questions or Alice's depression. My closest sister refused to speak to me. Her mind was only filled with her anger for being forced to leave Bella and how much of a selfish idiot she thought I was. 'Selfish? How the hell was it selfish?' I would think to myself. I left the only good thing that had ever come into my life for_ her_ benefit. But the accusations wouldn't stop. So I did the only that, according to Alice, I was good at it. I left.

Since my family could not return to Forks, we moved to Alaska. At first it was only Esme and Carlisle. The others had enough of 'family living' after what I'd put them through. Jasper had taken Alice on a whirl wind shopping tour of Europe in an attempt to alleviate her depression. Rose and Emmett went to a private island in the Aegean Sea. Eventually they came back, mostly for Esme's benefit. She loved having us there. And I returned as well.

Esme welcomed me with open arms, as if nothing had happened. Carlisle was the same way. However, the others were different story. Rosalie couldn't get over the excitement of the family being 'how it should be'. She was so hard to listen to. She caused my depression to come in waves by thinking of how happy she was about my decision. Emmett, although while not elated like Rosalie, was not as angry as he once was. Jasper was still regretting the birthday fiasco even though that wasn't the only reason for my decision. It was 'just the straw that broke the camel's back'. On more than once occasion I had tried to reason with him, but to no avail. Alice was as angry with me as the first day. No one else but Jasper and I knew it. For the sake of the family, she had put on a happy face. But between what I 'heard' and Jasper felt, we knew she was everything but.

I had only been back for a couple weeks now. My boxes were still packed in my third story room. It was a tradition. The houses we bought always had three stories. I always had a room there. Normally I had the one with the best view if Alice was feeling generous. This time she wasn't. It didn't have the best view, but it was certainly not the worst.

The house was on the outskirts a little town and backed right up to the large forests of 'America's final frontier'. My room had a balcony that overlooked the yard facing the forest. Alice's was similar, but she also had a better view of the nearby lake. The house had been built to Esme's specifications nine years ago. And was almost the exact replica of our home in Forks. I don't know why she did it. Maybe it was to commemorate our 'happiest time'. For my benefit, she tried very hard to not think about it, but that was what she had called it. 'Our happiest time': when all of her children were finally content, all six of us.

**BPOV **

With as much stealth as I could manage, I sneaked up on to the bed, crawling on all fours towards the brown naked mass of man that lay there. He was sprawled out stomach down, almost covering our entire king sized bed. One muscular arm was thrust beneath the pillow, while the other dangled off the side of the bed. His jaw hung wide open. Perhaps a deliberate attempt to catch flies? I smirked at that thought. His feet cleared the end of the bed by a couple inches. When we bought the bed, I had reminded him of his habit of scooting down the bed as he slept, but he assured me the bed was long enough.

I slowly dragged the white sheet off his body, exposing every inch of his taut bronze body. Once the sheet exposed everything but his luscious back side, I threw my leg over him, straddling his waist. I swear, a nuclear bomb could drop on our house and he would not wake. I smiled and bit my lip to suppress a giggle as I bent down to his ear, bracing my hands on those wonderful shoulder blades of his for support.

I blew softly into his ear. "Wake up," I whispered, my failing attempt at being seducing. Not that I had much to worry about, he couldn't wake up even if I told him I had learned something from the Kama Sutra. What can I say? My man was a hard sleeper. Luckily for me, I had a back-up plan and one that has never failed yet.

"Hey, wake up," I asked again as I softly bit down on his ear lobe. It probably lasted a second, maybe, before I was flipped over to my back with a very awake Jacob nestled between my thighs.

Somehow during the flipping, my hand had wound up against his face, which he eagerly kissed good morning before taking it in to his much larger hand, allowing it to rest upon his neck. I giggled at the sight of him. Deep ridges ran along the right side of his face where he had slept on crumpled sheets, causing his smile to crinkle on one side. I couldn't help but stare, despite the wrinkles from the sheets, he still looked breath taking.

"What?" he asked, noting my not too subtle staring.

"Nothing," I smiled and shook my head, continuing my evaluation of the perfect specimen in front of me.

His thick black hair was over do for a cut and stuck out in unkempt, messy disarray. A painful pang ripped across my chest at how disturbingly similar the style was. Fortunately, I didn't have much time to dwell on it before Jake leaned over and captured my lips with his.

"Good morning, my beautiful wife," he growled as he playfully kissed his way across my neck. My hand was still captured in his, my fingers reflexively curling around his thumb, while my other hand stroked the smooth firmness of his bicep.

"Morning, my sweet husband," I responded before kissing his nose and pushing him over.

A pout overcame his face as I climbed, well, stumbled, from our bed and over to the walk-in closet. "That's it? That's all the good morning I get?" He flopped back down to the bed, and continued to whine, "Come on, Bells, you got me all keyed up for nothing."

Grabbing a pair of his boxers and jeans, I made my way over to the bed before throwing them in his face. "Come on," I laughed, playfully smacking his thigh as he pouted from beneath the clothes. "Get up! We don't want to miss the plane for our great Alaskan adventure!" I waltzed into our bathroom and began to brush my teeth.

I was excited and apprehensive at the same time. A family vacation had been my idea. Mary and Elizabeth were finally old enough to appreciate things in nature, and I wanted to take them on a vacation they'd always remember. I had suggested Yellowstone but Jacob shot it down with a "It's so overdone, Bella. Where's your sense of adventure?" The girls, of course, took their father's side. They were 'daddy's girls' through and through. So, Jake suggested Alaska, the girls pleading at his side.

It wasn't that I was 'terrified' of the untamed wild. We were going to be staying in a very nice resort for its grand opening. It was because of, well, the other 'people' that lived there. What if_ he_ was there? I shook my head sadly as I spat the frothy mix into the sink. It was ten years after the fact and I still couldn't think, let alone_ say_, his name. It was utterly pathetic. I have nothing to be unhappy about. There was no reason for me to bepining or missing him. I had a well paying job and I was married to a great man who gave me two beautiful daughters. We had a beautiful two story home complete with a white picket fence. Hell, we even had a Golden Retriever named Ol' Dan! With the exception of Jacob being Quileute, we looked like you're stereotypical American family. I had nothing to complain about. My life was complete. I should be_ thanking_ him for leaving me, for not loving me. It was a blessing that he had left me out there in the woods and told me how he really felt. Angry tears stung my eyes as I stared at myself in the mirror. How pathetic. I angrily shook my head; I wasn't going to think about this. Not today, not ever. I'll be true to my word, he will not interfere with my perfect life.

I turned the faucet off after splashing my face with water and blotting it dry with a towel. After faking a sneeze, I blew my nose with some tissue, getting rid of the evidence of my stupidity. It wasn't fair to Jacob for me to think about_ him_.

After he left, Jacob was there for me. He was there through everything, through the good times and the break downs. I guess it was graduation when I realized he wasn't coming back for me. That he was gone for good. It was then I started letting Jacob love me the way he wanted to. It was only fair, right? I mean, I loved Jacob too. He was amazing; he was my best friend, and my confidante. Besides, _he_ was never coming back.

I was a sophomore in college when Jacob proposed. It was inevitable; everyone was waiting for the day, even me. I said yes and vowed to myself to be the perfect wife, and to never let _him_ interfere with that. So I gave myself to Jacob as wholly as I could, and forever became Isabella Marie Black.

Jake was nowhere to be seen when I exited the bathroom. Depending on the situation, that could be good and bad. If it was good, he was out of bed and hopefully clothed. If it was bad, he would be standing around the corner waiting to whisk me back off to bed. Sighing, I very cautiously made my way out of the room.

Shockingly, I made it all the way down the stairs without running into Jacob, my girls, or the floor. This was a good day, I couldn't help but smile. The smell of pancakes hit my nose as I came into the kitchen. A mop of dark curly hair bounded over to me. "Mama! Mama!" Mary Alice, seven years old and the eldest by two minutes, was latched to my hand. "Look! We made pancakes!"

"I see that! It smells delicious," I hid my disappointment as I looked around my damaged, dirtied kitchen. Oh well, Jacob could clean up this mess. He was the one who had taught them to make pancakes. I looked down at our clasped hands, I looked like a ghost compared to them. Thanks to my wonderful contribution to the gene pool, they weren't as dark as their father. But, thankfully, they weren't as pasty as their mother. As she let go to run to her father, I pulled her back by the shirt collar to quickly tie her shoulder length hair back. "Now what should good chefs always do?" I gently reminded her. She poked her tongue out and I had to resist the urge to laugh.

"They always put their hair up," she recited. "Because eating air is better than eating hair. Can I go see Daddy now?"

Daddy's girl she was. No one wants to spend time with their mother. Although, I'd have to admit, with Jake as a dad, I don't blame them. If he was my dad, I'd ditch Renee any day. But, thankfully, he isn't. We may be living in the south, but not that kind of south.

"Is Mama up?" I heard Beth ask as soon as Mary hit the living room. I entered right behind them.

"Yep, but I already showed her," smugness was already evident as she plopped down next to Jake on the floor.

"Mary Alice! You said _WE_ were going to show her! You already got to show Daddy!" Elizabeth jumped up from her bean bag. Her tiny hands were balled up and on her hips. Jake and I prepared for the tennis match of words that was about to ensue.

"Na-uh!"

"Yeah-huh!"

"Na-uh!"

"Yeah-huh!" Elizabeth took a step towards Mary, the tell-tale getting-ready-to-pummel move, time to break it up. Darn, and Jake and I were already ready for the always entertaining name calling match.

"Come here Elizabeth," I sat down on the other side of Jake, as Elizabeth bounded over and into my lap. "Are you all finished packing?" Maybe not an interesting topic, but better then the pancake display war.

"Yes mommy, but why do we have the marshmallow jackets?" Mary Alice crinkled her nose. "I feel like that the fluffy guy on the tire commercial." What a fashion junkie, just like her namesake.

Jake chuckled, "That would be the Michelin Man, and Alaska is way colder than Arizona."

"But its summer," she retorted, "And Ms. Medellin said that their summers were warm and you can wear short sleeves."

"Yes, but we don't know until we get there. Besides, we might go up on some mountains and it's always cold there. Anyways, let's go eat those delicious pancakes you two made. And then it's time for..." Jake threw out his hands, prompting them to answer.

"OUR GREAT ALASKAN ADVENTURE!!" They simultaneously screeched before dashing into the kitchen.

I was already half way up from the couch when Jake grabbed my wrist, and dragged me back down to him. "Mr. Black, we have to get ready."

A deep chuckle rumbled through his chest as he pressed his lips to my forehead. "Did we get a suite? With a room for the girls?"

I smiled into his chest and nodded.

"Good, because I was definitely in the mood for playing Little Red Riding Hood. So you had better pack your costume."

"Oh, can I be the big bad wolf this time?" I tried to ask as seriously as I could, but my cheeks were already stained red.

"Oh," he laughed, kissing my cheek, "I don't think you're qualified."

"That's too bad," I giggled as I finally untangled myself from him and got up.

"Hey Bella?" He still had a hold of my hand as he looked up at me from the couch.

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

I couldn't help the stupid grin that spread over my face when he said that. He meant it, and I knew it.

"I love you too, Jake."

**A/N: Six including Bella **

**Remember! The periwinkle button is your friend :-)**


	2. Chapter 2

**DISCLAIMER: I still don't own Twilight :( Just the twins. Oh, and I don't own Crocs either. But that's okay, I never liked them much anyways.**

* * *

**EPOV**

_-Flashback-_

_My jaw just hung open. You have got to be kidding me. Of everything Rose and Emmett could come up with, this had to be the most ridiculous yet._

_I looked up at the main entrance to Rosalie's latest fad. The large log awning stretched nearly to the bridge that connected travelers from the road to the resort. To add to its rustic flare, river rocks formed a base around each of the towering log columns. The doors of the resort were equally dramatic. Large wooden doors seemed to be woven out of dark mahogany branches, almost mimicking locked antlers. Stained glass filled most of the gaps save for the large semi circle portions on each door that was filled with traditional glass, a taste to the outside of the luxury within._

_The towering strip of the log resort concaved slightly as it followed the gentle bend of the river that rested at its base. Two large boat houses jutted out over the water's edge as miniature replicas of the main entrance to the resort. _

_I almost wanted to laugh out loud. I couldn't believe this. Just then, a strong hand clapped down on my shoulder. I looked up to see Emmett, he was nodding with his lips in a hard line. "Yep, I know what you're thinking. 'Why?' Well, Rosie got tired of staying in luxury resorts and everything not being up to her standards, so I told her if she didn't like it, then she should start one of her own."_

_I gave him a look of horror. Why would he suggest this? He threw his hands up in admittance at my expression. "Honestly, I didn't think she'd take me seriously. It was just a suggestion. Next thing I know, she's asking Carlisle for this property and calling contractors and what-not," he absentmindedly scratched the back of his head as he reminisced, finally he shrugged his shoulders and just smiled, "And six years later, here we are. You got here just in time for the grand opening of the Sedna Luxury Resort and Lodge, experience the luxury of the frontier," we both chuckled at the last part._

_"Is that really the slogan?" _

_"Hell if I know, that woman changes her mind so often even Alice has trouble keeping up." He smiled at me, his dimples standing out prominently as he stretched his hand out to me. "I've missed you, brother."_

_As I clamped my hand on his, he drew me into a hug, "I've missed you too, Emmett."_

_"Esme's going to freak," he shook his head smiling, he left the rest unsaid. Alice refused to look for me when she could help it. Emmett was the only one that knew I was here._

_-End Flashback-_

It was three in the morning. Vampires were everywhere. Well, three vampires seemed to be everywhere. The first guests would be arriving later today and Esme, Alice, and Rose were going to give them the show of their lifetime. This was the only time they could work without the humans.

I stood in the grand entrance. And it was grand. Rose did everything to the extreme. The vaulted ceilings let in the maximum amount of sunlight through large sky lights. We'd be greeting the guests in the shadier side of the entrance next to the large river rock fireplace and front desk. Esme thought it would be nice to personally greet the guests. There were only going to be about two hundred parties with us as a type of trial run. One hundred of the parties were citizens in the prime of their life or couples with no children, the other hundred were families with children ages zero to seventeen. Rosalie wanted to get an idea of how best to cater to both sides of the vacationing spectrum. I had to hand it her, she knew how to run a business.

Carlisle, Jasper and Emmett sat near the ostentatious fireplace on a leather couch just watching their women work. I could be one of them, married, watching my wife freak out about if everything was clean enough when it already looked perfect to me. But the only woman I'd ever want to make my wife probably hated me. I grimaced and walked back out of the resort. This had to be the worst part of coming home. I was the fifth wheel again.

The sky was overcast today, the prime reason for living in Alaska; that and the over abundance of wild life. The resort was located near one of the most active streams in salmon season. Rose did this for both the tourists and her husband. It allowed for an enormous amount of Grizzlies for tourists to watch and for Em to eat. I wasn't hungry, but it couldn't hurt to eat anyways. Alice wanted me stuffed since she and I were assigned to the children's area for the duration of the trial period, and children are always hurting and cutting themselves. The family decided to personally supervise the first two weeks, the length of this trial run. Rose and Esme were in charge of the spa while Jasper, Emmett and Carlisle were going to keep an eye on the adult activities like fly fishing and the new casino. Alice was stuck with me.

The first of the salmon were beginning to make their way upstream. A few bears had already gathered, a pathetic showing compared to what this area would be like in a couple of days. Rose expected at least twenty to thirty bears in this one area alone. I almost pitied the fish, it was a miracle any of them reached the spawning site.

* * *

**BPOV**

"Come on, Mom!" Beth squealed at me, "We're going to miss the connection!"

"Elizabeth, a woman can only pee so fast," I growled through the bathroom stall. Her pink Croc covered feet stamped on the other side.

"Well, try and pee faster!"

"Mom! Hurry up!" I could hear the restroom door slam behind Mary as she too came to harass me about my peeing abilities. "Dad's already waiting. He says we're going to leave without you if you don't hurry!"

_Ugh_, I finished and flushed the toilet. I hated toilets on the airplane. With my clumsiness, it was not a good idea. I had to hold it for hours until we landed for our connecting flight when I could finally pee without worrying about my clumsiness.

I walked out to wash my hands. Three brown eyes and one green followed me. We still don't know how Beth ended up with one green eye and one brown. Genetics were crazy.

"Stop glaring at me like that! And get those scowls off your faces. One day your face is going to get stuck like that," I told them. Mary Alice stuck her tongue out through the gap her missing front teeth had made. She giggled and then both grabbed me and pushed me out the door.

"God, Bella, could you pee any slower?" Mary Alice relinquished her hold on my as Jacob took my hand. She had gone to latch on to his other side. I was really tired of being made fun of for my restroom habits.

"Sorry, I can't just whip it out you know, it takes time," I mumbled, not wanting the girls to hear me. They didn't need to know what really made Daddy different from us.

He glanced at me with a goofy grin. "Just come on," he chuckled, proceeding to drag us through the busy airport.

Watching Jake move through the crowds was like watching Moses part the Red Sea. People just automatically parted to make way for his massive frame. I doubt they even saw the wife and two girls he was practically dragging to the gate. All of us plopped down into seats of the waiting area. We made it with fifteen minutes to spare.

"See? We had plenty of time. I could have gone twice."

"I don't see why you just don't use the plane's restroom."

"Jacob Black, do you know who you're married to? Unless you want a pee soaked wife after we hit turbulence, you should be thanking me for going here and not only god knows how many feet in the air."

Snorting was his only response.

"Don't be angry just because I'm older than you so I'm always right."

"I thought we agreed I was older because I could fix cars," he said, remembering our 'age game' from our younger years.

"Yes, but that was before I gave birth. To twins. That's a hefty amount of age points right there."

"So, you're what, sixty now?" I didn't know if I liked the sound of 'sixty'. "You're a pretty hot grandma then." He leaned down and kissed my cheek, I could feel my cheeks burning. He might not have been _him_ but he was still pretty good at the whole saying the 'right thing at the right time' thing.

Beth looked up with confusion from her _Magic Tree House_ book. "I thought Mommy was Twenty-seven…"

"Section E and F now loading," the receptionist called over the loudspeaker as I shrugged on the backpack with the girls' entertainment.

"I am. Now let's go. This is the last stop before Alaska." I flashed the lady our tickets as we excitedly entered the plane for the last time today.

* * *

"Remember to chew, girls." I looked over to my left down at Beth as I held her hand and then behind me to Mary as we began our descent.

"Don't worry, Mom," Beth patted my hand, "We're not going to crash."

"Yeah," Mary's hands peaked between mine and Beth's seats as she craned her head, "We'll remember to chew, you just need to remember to breath."

"Har, har, har," I replied sarcastically, "Very funny." But it was true. In, two, three, four. Out, two, three, four. I was fine with flying, just not taking off or landing. The rest of my family, well, they found it funny. Beth might be the only one with sympathy for me.

* * *

"Oh my gosh, Jake! This is going to be amazing!" I looked through the brochure for our resort: the Sedna Luxury Resort and Spa, Experience the Luxury of the Frontier.

He grunted behind me as he dragged our entire luggage.

"Sweetheart, I told you I could've gotten a dolly. You don't need to carry all of our stuff."

"I've got it, Bella. It's not heavy; I just don't have enough hands. That place better be good for the amount we're spending on it."

"Oh it sure sounds like it!" I caught the twins running circles around their father as he tried not to step on them. "Girls, stop making this harder for your father. Get over here and leave him alone." Slowly but surely we were making our way to the front of the airport. "Look!" I pointed to the brochure that I was sure no one was looking at. "They have a day care center for the girls, where they can go on hikes and swim at the indoor water park. They have a one to four counselor-kid ratio! You know what that leaves us free for," I gave him a mischievous wink over my shoulder. "Oh! And I can't wait for the spa! Since it's the opening we get complimentary massages! We should probably schedule though, I bet its going to be packed."

We made it outside to our rental car and I opened the door to the little red sedan and shooed the girls in. Jake already had the trunk open and was almost done loading it by the time I got back there to help. "I'm so excited!" I told him as I put the last bag in the trunk, "This is going to be awesome." I put my hands on his hips and pulled him close. Which wasn't that close. Even though it was August, the temperature was sixty-four degrees. Too cold for me, I was bundled up in a sweater while Jake was only wearing a t-shirt. Stupid, hot werewolves.

"Two weeks of family time, with breaks for us time," he said as he kissed my temple. "All while exploring the great outdoors."

I giggled, "Personally, I wasn't thinking of exploring the outdoors. I wanted to explore something else." I dropped the keys into his jeans pocket and went to the passenger side of the car.

* * *

The drive to the resort wasn't long from the airport. Luckily, like Forks, everything was located right off the highway and the side road was easy to find.

Jake let out a low whistle as the resort slowly grew larger. "Damn, Bella."

I smacked him in the thigh, "Language!" I hissed.

The man back tracked, "I mean dang Bella. This place is huge!"

"Mommy! Look at the horses!" Beth chirped and pointed out the window.

The gently winding road slowly made it's way past the resort's stables. I'm pretty sure Jake slowed down to let us take it in. It was beautiful. Being summer, the wild flowers were in full bloom, carpeting the surrounding area in a menagerie of yellows and reds. Light brown logs fenced in multiple pastures were horses of all types were grazing. The flowers were in such abundance, I was fairly sure the animals could no longer see the grass. Every now and then, one would lift its head and watch us pass, flicking its tail or ear lazily before resuming its favorite past time. Passed the pastures and barn, the large curved resort was nestled on the banks of a narrow river, connected to the road by an arched stone bridge. The resort was accented by its amazing backdrop. Large, jagged mountains rose up behind the resort and flanked it to either side. I pointed to the tops of the peaks were the clouds had cleared, showing my daughters the white snow that covered each.

"I think Alaska was a really good idea, Jake," I barely whispered as I placed my hand on his thigh. He removed one hand from the steering wheel and covered my own.

The rest of the short ride was made in silence. All of us were too in awe of the surrounding beauty to speak.

"Daddy, please can we ride the horses?" Beth began begging about the horses as soon as we pulled into the parking lot. I had already issued my verdict, so now she was attempting to get Jake take her side.

I love horses. I think they're beautiful animals. But they're big. Not just big, huge; huge animals with a tendency to freak out at their shadows. Call me overprotective, but I was not letting my baby on a half ton animal that I don't even know and could go hay wire for no good reason.

Elizabeth started huffing in the back seat as her whining escalated. Mary Alice soon joined her sister's cause as well.

Jake sighed, and I internally panicked. Sighing was always a sign of resignation. I glared at him as he dared to glance at me. The look that flashed across his face told me he had rethought what he had been about to say. Apparently I looked scarier than I thought.

"Um, girls, listen," He began only to be interrupted by a chorus of 'But Daddy!'s. Jake looked at me, pleading for my consent. Stubbornly, I shook my head. "We'll see." He told them. The girls flopped back into their seats with a muttering of fine and Jake just shook his head to himself. I know he hated to be the bad guy, but I'd find some way to make it up to him.

Beth and Mary Alice were awfully quiet as Jake began to make his way to the front door of the resort. I hoped they weren't too upset. "Hey girls," I turned in my seat to look at them. Both were staring out their windows, arms crossed over the chest, with the same face Jake made when he was pouting. "Instead of waiting for Daddy in the car, how about we go into those shops over there and try and find a snack?"

The side of Mary Alice's mouth twitched as she tried not to smile, attempting to hold the scowl for as long as possible. Elizabeth was much more forgiving. "Sure, Mama! That sounds great!" Elizabeth clambered out of the car, the polar opposite of Mary who continued to sulk.

* * *

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!! **

**Periwinkle Button Happiness :-)**


	3. Chapter 3

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own **_**Twilight.**_

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews guys. They make me smile. :-)**** Especially since I'm new to this whole authoring deal. Don't forget about the poll. :-)**

* * *

**EPOV**

I brushed my hands free of the dirt after burying the bear carcass. The tourists would be arriving about now. Esme, Alice, Rose, and possibly Carlisle would be there to greet them. Jasper and Emmett might too, though I doubt it. Especially Jasper. The birthday incident had been a major setback for him.

I laid down in grass. The tall wildflowers brushed against my arm. It was a clearing, a meadow, not too far from the stream where the carnivore had met his end. The meadow was beautiful to the extent of it being surreal as the smell of strawberry shampoo wafted through the trees.

I closed my eyes and leaned my head back in my hands. I wanted to sleep so badly, desperate to dream of her. Day dreams were the next best thing. She would have loved Alaska. This meadow would have surpassed the one in Forks if she was here. That was the only thing making that meadow more beautiful then all others.

The faint smell of freesia and strawberry tantalized my memories as I recalled everything about her.

There, Bella sat beside me. Hesitantly she inched over and moved her fingertips over my outstretched arm, tracing the patterns of the bluish veins. She appeared to be strangely fascinated by it. I relaxed further into the ground, relishing in her touch. It was warm and light, a strange sensation for my cold body. Gently she picked up my hand, running her delicate fingers over mine before trying to turn it over. I flipped my palm up for her, I thought it was slow, but she startled. Her hand froze in mid air.

"Sorry," I murmured. "It's too easy to be myself with you."

She smiled and took my hand in hers, turning it the way and that, watching the sun dance across my flesh. What was she thinking? Was she honestly not scared of me? What did she think of this sparkling monstrosity before her? I couldn't fathom what she was thinking. It was so strange to not be able to hear this most perplexing woman.

"Tell me what you're thinking," I said softly, watching her explore the skin of a monster. I almost thought she hadn't heard until she turned her beautiful brown eyes on me. "It's so strange, not knowing."

I got lost looking into her eyes. I barely knew her, and I was utterly trapped under her spell. She was intoxicating, and I never wanted to be without her.

_Where the hell is he?_

My head snapped up, my Bella vanishing before my eyes as Emmett came in to the meadow.

"Did you eat without me?" He asked, kicking the freshly turned dirt.

"Sorry," I mumbled, still in a slight daze from the powerful memory. Her scent still stayed with me. It was faint, but it was there. I was getting better at this.

"Yeah, well, Rose is beginning to spaz since her head kiddy counselor is missing."

I groaned. "I thought I didn't need to be there to greet the guests."

"You don't," he snorted. _That was four hours ago, man. Parents are already beginning to bring their kids by. _

"They're that eager to get rid of them? Some parents."

"Yeah, well, their business not ours. You and Al just have to watch 'em." He turned to leave the clearing, waiting for me to follow.

"You know," he started off slowly.

"What?" I wasn't in the mood to read his mind.

"Jacob Black's here."

I looked at him as we walked at a human pace. "So? What about it?"

Emmett shrugged, "I dunno. He's a werewolf. I thought it was interesting."

I took a peek to see if that was it. And it was, just Jacob Black checking in for his wife and two children. The expression on his face clearly depicted he was not happy to see us.

* * *

**BPOV**

The girls and I sat outside of a small café that had been built for the resort. It mirrored the resort in its attempt to look like a mountain cabin. The girls were eating some ice cream, lazily swinging their legs back and forth. I swear, no matter how cold it is children will always want ice cream.

I scanned the passer-bys for my husband as I nursed my warm latté, Jacob's frozen coffee sat beside me. I had texted him about ten minutes ago, letting him know where the girls and I went.

"And then, then he asked me to sit next to him at lunch!"

"No he didn't, Mary Alice. Don't be a liar," Beth looked at her story-telling twin.

"It was true! He says he wants to marry me!"

I had tuned them out up until I heard that. "You know the rules Mary Alice, you can't marry until you're thirty."

She giggled and looked at me from across the table. "You're a joker, Mommy. You're not thirty and you're married!"

I rolled my eyes, she had a point. I'm a hypocrite, you caught me. "Do as I say, not as I do."

Mary cocked her head to the side. I think my 'high and mighty' statement confused her. "Besides, he's got to be able to beat up your Daddy if he wants to marry you," I stated matter-of-factly. Her brown eyes went wide.

"Th-they'd have to f-fight?"

I nodded, "Yep. On horses and everything," I proceeded to tell her. "After all, if you're a princess like you're always telling people, then that makes Daddy a King. And no one marries a princess without fighting the King. It's the rules."

Beth nodded, she had caught on to my sarcasm. "Yeah, there's always a fight! Remember when the Prince had to fight the evil witch to marry Aurora? Or when Simba had to fight to Scar to marry Nala? Or when the Beast and Gaston fought for Bell? He'd have to fight Daddy. It's the rules! Mommy's right, Disney says so."

Elizabeth Rosalie Black was always the sharper of my two. Her twin may be able to come up with wittier remarks but Beth knew the ins and outs of sarcasm like the back of her hand. Needless to say, they had some extremely amusing conversations.

Mary huffed in defeat. "I guess he won't marry me then. I don't want him to hurt Daddy!"

I'm positive I mirrored Beth's incredulous expression. "Mary Alice, you're so stupid! You should be worried about Kevin, not Daddy!"

"Elizabeth," I said sharply, "We do not talk like that!"

"I'm not stupid!" Uh-oh, here we go. "You're the stupider one!"

"Stupider's not even a word, Mary Alice," Beth rolled her eyes. "Everyone knows that."

"Yeah, well," Mary Alice hated it when someone pointed out she was wrong, "You're a stupid, doo-doo head and you're just angry because Kevin made fun of your weird eye!"

"Mary Alice Renee Black!" She shrank back in her chair. She knew she was in trouble now. I was fuming. "That's enough! We came here to have a nice vacation and you two girls will not be ruining it for us. You two are going to be nice and get along or else we will pack up and fly home right now!"

The girls proceeded glaring at each other. "Beth, you first."

She sighed. "I'm sorry for calling you stupid, Mary Alice. You're really not."

"I'm sorry for making fun of you and saying Kevin made fun of your green eye. It's not weird. It's actually pretty cool."

"Come on, you know the drill," I prompted. They pulled themselves out of the chairs and hugged each other before climbing back up.

Where was that husband of mine? Just then, my phone started to buzz.

_OMW. Luv u._

_J_

"Where's Daddy?" Mary asked. I swear, was my family telepathic?

"He's on his way."

The look on Jacob's face was absolutely terrifying as he walked up to us. He roughly grabbed my wrist and hauled me up out of my chair.

"Come on girls, we're leaving," he growled. The girls said nothing and just followed behind us.

"Jacob, let go of my wrist," I hissed, not wanting the girls see us argue, if that's what we were doing. "You're hurting me."

Instantly his hand let go and he inspected my wrist. His body was still shaking in anger; I momentarily feared he was going to phase right there in the middle of the sidewalk.

"What's wrong?" I moved my hand up his arm, hoping to calm him. "Talk to me."

"We're leaving. We're not staying here," his teeth were clenched.

"And why not? We just got here, Jake. We've saved for months to go on this trip."

"Because," He turned to look at me. The girls ran into my legs as we abruptly stopped. Jacob cradled my face gently in his hands. "The owners," he began, his breathing was ragged as he fought for control and words. "The owners… They're…." Jake growled, I mean really growled. Whatever happened, he was pissed.

"The owners are what, Jake?" I prodded softly, covering his hands with mine, trying to will him to calm down.

"The owners are," he angrily shook his head and sighed. "They're complete douche bags." He said the last part so softly I almost missed it.

My jaw dropped and I promptly shut it, trying to stop the laughter that was threatening to explode. I thought he was going to say they were convicted pedophiles or thieves or something like that. Not douche bags. "So the owners are douche bags?" I asked slowly, trying to hide the laughter in my voice.

He looked like a dejected puppy as his hands dropped from my face and he turned to walk away. "Jacob," I called after him and grabbed his hand, pulling him to me, "Sweetheart, you have to admit, it's a bit ridiculous to cancel our entire vacation because you had a bad incident with the owners." He refused to look at me. It was my turn to cradle his face with my hands. "Look at me," His brown eyes found mine. "Jacob, please don't make us leave. If you really want to, we can. But, honestly, what are the chances we'll even see the owners? They're here for the grand opening and that's it. Please let's stay. The girls are really excited about this. And I am too."

"Bella, I really think we should leave," he seemed unmoved by my pleas.

I sighed and folded my arms over my chest. "Fine, but you're telling the girls why we're leaving and wasting more than 1,000 for our supposed dream vacation. And, may I remind you, that we cannot get a refund because someone did not want to by an insurance policy?" I knew I was playing dirty and all, but I wanted to stay. Alaska was beautiful, the resort was beautiful, everything was beautiful. We had gotten so excited over it all. The girls and I had even started making an itinerary while waiting for Jacob.

"We'll stay," he grumbled, if I wasn't standing so close I wouldn't have heard him.

"What?"

"I said we'll stay," he repeated a little louder. I couldn't help squealing in delight as I threw my arms around his neck.

"Don't worry," I said after kissing him fully on the lips, causing the girls to start making gagging noises, "I'll fend off those mean nasty owners."

He gave me a half hearted smile. I silently wondered if maybe the owners were bigots or if they had treated an old woman badly in front of him. I'd have to ask him once we were securely in our room with no chance of his escape.

* * *

"Mommy?" Beth asked. Her legs were folded Indian style as she sat on the end of her large queen sized bed.

The suite was gorgeous. It was on the fourth floor of the resort. We didn't want a cabin because I wanted to be close to the child's care center and Jake wanted to be close to the main dining hall. Our room was on the back side of the resort and overlooked the lush green meadow as it ran down a low hill and to the forests at the mountain's base. If we were lucky and I woke the girls early, we might be able to see some wildlife from our private balcony. Maybe a deer or even a Grizzly. They would get a kick out of that.

The girls' bedroom was very spacious and held two queen sized beds. The walls were an off white, almost beige, that stretched into what seemed to be a vaulted ceiling. Of course it was just the illusion of the design, but it did make the entire room seem large and airy. The girls did not have a balcony like Jake and I, but instead had an almost wall sized window with automatic curtains. A rule was instantly made up for the button. Wrecking the automatic curtains would not make the vacation fun.

Mine and Jake's room was similar to the girls, only larger and had one extra large king sized bed. Instead of the large window, ours had glass French doors that lead to a private balcony equipped with a mini bar and Jacuzzi. The owners may be douche bags, but at least they had good taste. Our bathroom also had a large garden tub and a shower large enough for a party. The girls had to share a small half bathroom, which was okay; it was about the same size of the one for them at home.

Even Jake was impressed by the luxury of the room and he seemed to forget about his bad encounter with the owners. Of course, his big thing was the plasma screen television in the suite's living room. The suite was equipped with a sound system that made ours look like a card board box. And we invested a hefty sum of money for it too. Our room, as well as the girls', had a smaller plasma screen television, but I could tell this one had captured his heart. Men and their toys.

"Hey, Mommy?" Beth asked again, bringing me out of my reverie.

"What is it, sweetheart?" I looked up from unpacking her sister's clothes.

"What's a douche bag?"

"Um…"

* * *

**A/N: Remember to review! :-)**** Thank you! **


	4. Chapter 4

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own **_**Twilight. :- ( **_**Also, I'm not sure where the phrase "McFuckme" comes from or if it's purely the creation of Halojones. So, I'm just going to be safe and credit it to her. You should really read her work. It's phenomenal. She's either on my favorite author's list or her stories are favorited, or both. :-P**__

**EPOV**

"Good morning everyone!" Alice's sing song voice grated along every nerve of every person in range.

Today was the first full day of Sedna's child care camp. Parents had been lines up since seven am, eager to get rid of their offspring. However, their content groggy state was quickly dissipating under Alice's inhuman peppiness. Some parents laughed at what their children must endure, others doubted her sanity. I can't say that I blame them.

"We have a fun filled day for you! With lots of games to help us get to know you better. And if you're good, we'll go on our first hike and have a picnic in a beautiful meadow that my brother and I want to share with you!"

Okay, she was really getting on my nerves and everyone else's. This was not some freaking television show and half the kids were still asleep. I'm sure she knew we'd have to repeat ourselves later. My personal hell was just beginning and already my mind was swimming with the thoughts of others. It was strange being around so many people again. My mind was still in the "remembering how to ride a bike" phase of blocking people out. The first few feet were always the worst. Unfortunately, it seemed like I was trying to remember how to ride on a narrow mountain pass with a two thousand foot drop to certain death, well maybe not death. But insanity certainly seemed plausible.

_Edward? EARTH TO EDWARD!_ Alice's voice screamed in my head.

"Ow… Is it my turn?" I looked up at the expectant line, apparently it _was_ my turn. "Hello, I'm Edward, and vice camp counselor to my sister, Alice. If you'd please sign your children in on this clipboard," I gestured to where it sat on the table beside me. "You can leave your children here and enjoy your day. Just remember to bring your photo ID with you to pick them up." Despite feeling like shit, I put on a smile.

_Oh my god! He's so hot!_ Oh no. I told Alice it should be only us or at least male counselors. This was just as bad as high school.

_Wow, I'm so thanking mom for getting me this job!_

_Shit, I hope he's not gay! What a waste that would be!_

_Damn it, now I'm not going to get any girls with Counselor McFuckme here_.

Well that was… unique. I scanned the crowd for the voice's owner, the only male counselor, aside from myself. Oh goody. To be completely honest, my presence in no way affected his lack of female attention. Two things were responsible for that. The primary reason, he was ugly. Flat. Out. Ugly. Greasy black hair was a sure turn off, and, on an unfortunate note, he was suffering from a very bad case of acne. Compared to what girls thought of him, my physical assessment was more complimenting him. As if his bad hygiene wasn't enough, this was not a case of misjudging the book by its cover. The second reason for his lack of female attention was himself. The boy was a perverted chauvinistic pig. Lucky for him, he stuck to women in his age range. If he didn't, well, the resort owners are not liable for any injuries or deaths caused by the wild animals residing within the property's boundaries. Some of his thoughts made me want to vomit if I could. Or, as Bella once eloquently put it, "tossing your cookies."

_-Flash back-_

_Bella was curled up in a ball beneath the sheets. The room was as dark as I could make it. Forks decided to be sunny today. My heart broke as Bella complained about the amount of sunlight. I would put out the sun if it soothed her pain._

_"I'm sorry, love. I can't make it any darker." I kissed her shoulder as I molded my body to hers. Her fever made her extremely hot to the touch. If it didn't break soon, I was taking her to Carlisle, whether she wanted to or not._

_I chuckled softly as she brought my hand to cover her forehead. Even as a weak, sickly human, she was absolutely adorable. _

_"Stop laughing at me," she grumbled, "Just take the pain away and laugh later."_

_"If I could, I would. You know that," I whispered. "Are you feeling any better since yesterday?"_

_"No," she moaned, "I tossed my cookies after you left."_

_Oh, my poor angel. She loved cookies. It was awful to think she was that repulsed by her favorite food. But why on Earth would Charlie let her have cookies? You feed sick people soup! Not cookies. Even vampires know that._

_"I'm sorry. Listen, after you're better, I'll buy you a whole truckload of cookies. And you can eat till you burst."_

_"What?" She looked over her shoulder. "No, Edward," She giggled faintly, "not those kind of cookies."_

_I was puzzled, what other kinds of cookies, then? Maybe she was delusional. I need to check her temperature again._

_"I threw up yesterday, Edward," she continued quietly. Too much noise made her nauseous. "You know, vomit, up chuck, Technicolor yawn, tossing your cookies." She groaned in pain. My heart broke for her. "Why did you make me laugh?" She rolled over and buried her head in my chest. "You made it hurt."_

_"I'm sorry, love," I chuckled. "Try to sleep." I began to hum her lullaby. True to form, she was asleep within seconds. "I love you," I whispered into her hair._

_She mumbled unintelligibly in return and drifted into a deeper sleep. _

_-End Flash back-_

"Okay, kids! I'm Counselor Alice," Alice had gathered all the children in to a semi circle, there were about ten total. Good, maybe we could send Counselor Pervalot home for the day. "This is my brother Counselor Edward and over there we have counselors Faye, Christie and John." She gestured to the two girls and the pervert who were standing against the wall. Both girls waved shyly at the children while John attempted to be cool with a "Sup?" The children were not impressed.

_I hope I'm with Mr. Edward!_

_He's just how I always imagined my knight and shining armor to be!_

_Miss Alice seems so cool! I want to be in her group!_

_That John guy looks mean. But Miss Christie looks nice. Alice just looks fricken awesome!_

It seemed these children's instincts were not working properly. Instead of being repulsed by us, they were like moths to a flame.

**BPOV**

I rolled over in Jake's arms as I heard the girls' giggle outside our door.

"Shhhhh, be quiet, Beth!"

"I'm sorry, I'm trying," Beth stifled her giggles.

"We've got to be quiet if we want this to work," Mary Alice hissed.

"Okay, okay, just open the door. I hope it doesn't squeak."

That was my cue. I closed my eyes and I heard the door quietly open. The girls were breathing hard as they probably attempted to tip toe across the room. My side of the bed dipped down an inch. I felt one of the girls pushing down on it, probably trying to get as close to my face as possible.

"Ready?" I heard Mary whisper. "Three, two-"

"RAR!!" I yelled as I turned and lunged for them. Mary Alice screamed and hit the floor in surprise, Beth just stood there clutching her chest.

"I got you!" I howled in laughter. Alaska vacation: 2,000 Ice cream: 10.00 Scaring your children to death: Priceless. The looks on their faces… Man, I wish I had a camera.

"Mommy!" Beth was the first to recover. A silly grin was plastered on her face as she clambered on to the tall bed. "You shouldn't do that to people!" She scolded, scooting closer to me as she gave me hug.

"Well you shouldn't scare people when they're sleeping," I laughed and started to tickle her sides. She squealed in delight and attempted to get away.

"Mommy," she huffed in between giggles, "I can't breathe, stop." Her pleas continued. Mary Alice came to the rescue, attempting to tickle me so I could let go of her partner in crime.

Mary squealed as I felt her being picked up off of me. Jake now had her pinned to his chest as she struggled to get away. The more she struggled the tighter he held her.

Five minutes and multiple tickle attacks later, Jake and I lay in bed with the girls between us. It had been quiet for a while. The girls were trying to catch their breath as I absentmindedly played with Mary's brown curls. Jake and I just enjoyed the moment.

"So," Jake was the first to break the silence, "what are we going to do today?"

All three looked at me. I sighed, the responsibilities of motherhood. I was a chauffeur, chef, accountant, maid, confidante, comforter, lover, referee, and event-activities coordinator. "Um," I began, I had no clue what we should do, "Well, first we should get some breakfast. Then maybe we should go on a bike ride?"

"But it's so gloomy out today," Beth commented.

"Don't worry, it'll be fine. Not much different than from where your mother and I grew up."

**EPOV**

"Mr. Edward?" A little brown haired girl looked up at me as we made our way along the path to the meadow. Alice was in front of the line, I was in the middle and Christie was rounding up the back.

"Yes…" I searched her head for name, "Melissa?"

"Can I hold your hand?" The girl was only about five and constantly thought about how I should be in a Disney Princess movie. She was a sweet girl. Not nearly as annoying as the others. She blushed when I didn't give an immediate answer and stumbled on a low laying root.

I chuckled and caught her before she did a face plant. I set her up right and we kept walking.

"Of course you may." I offered my hand out to her. She beamed up at me before grasping it tightly.

"Wow, Mr. Edward," she gasped in surprise, "You sure are cold!"

I shrugged, "Maybe you're just warm."

She mulled over my words before nodding. "Maybe that's it," she mumbled and looked up at me again with a grin. "I like you a lot, Mr. Edward. You might be my new favorite person." She began to prattle cheerfully on while swinging our hands back and forth. I think we talked about her cat and her mom and how her Dad was the world's strongest man. I could hear Alice laughing up a head at us.

Alice had been more amiable since the resort opened. Her thoughts have been nicer and even Jasper said she wasn't depressed as she was before. I had a feeling it was just because she had something to do with her time now. She still wouldn't talk to me unless she had to. I realize her relationship with Bella was very special to her, but if she honestly believed that I _wanted_ to leave Bella and wanted to take Bella away from her for no reason but my own masochistic pleasure, then, well, I don't know what to think. It was a preposterous idea to begin with.

**BPOV**

If I had one complaint to make about this resort, it was they needed to have "beginner" bike trails. I never knew I was so out of shape. What was supposed to be a leisurely bike ride turned out to be Satan's revenge for all my past wrongs. Jake and the girls had a blast. It was understandable Jake could manage just fine. But my girls? I feel really old now. But here's a secret from me to you, uphill and unpaved trails are not my cup of tea.

"Mommy, what is this green stuff? And why is there black thingies floating in it?" Mary Alice looked up from the small white ceramic cup.

After the bike trip from hell, we found a Chinese restaurant in the plaza near Sedna. Hot , exhausted and sticky, I was not so easily persuaded to eat in said restaurant before washing up. But here we were. It was a nice little place too. I don't know if it was authentic. I'm fairly convinced the only place you'd ever find authentic Chinese food was in China. Apparently, you could also get your tea leaves read here. Jake thought it'd be fun. The girls did too- until they realized they had to drink the tea first.

"That's the tea," Jake explained to her. If you had told me Jake loved learning about foreign cultures when I was seventeen, I would have laughed right in your face. Maybe it was a result of fatherhood and wanting to be able to teach his offspring about the world, but Jake had become a regular culture connoisseur.

"I thought tea was black though," she scowled at the light green concoction.

"Black tea is black. This is obviously green tea," Beth responded. There's nothing cuter then little kids saying big words. When they just learned to talk, Jake and I tried so hard to say 'antidisestablishmentarianism' for the reward of ice cream, like that little kid off of the Dairy Queen commercial. It didn't work. Mary Alice was the first to finally say it when she was five. I don't remember if Elizabeth ever said it, I think we lost interest in the game.

"Daddy, is Beth lying?"

"Nope, this is green tea. It's supposed to be good for your health."

Right about then, our food came. Fried rice, wonton soup, and General Tso's chicken own my soul. I would bike ride to hell and back twice if I knew this was the reward.

"Would you like for me to read your tea leaves?" The tourist trap's matron was a kindly looking Asian woman. I wondered how big of a tip Jake would leave her. He was big tipper, whether we had the money to spare or not.

"Yes, please," Beth spoke up first and passed her cup to the woman.

She looked into it and her brow furrowed in concentration. "Hmmm, it seems like you and you're sister will be making new friends tomorrow. I'm not sure if you're father would approve of them though." Vagueness is always the key to good fortune telling. A friend to them could be a stray cat and Jake hates cats. She solemnly passed the cup back to Beth.

Mary had refused to drink her tea, so she had to be skipped. Jacob was up next. She barely looked into the cup before speaking, "You should be careful with how you speak to your wife. You'll be walking on thin ice soon." Jake just smiled nicely at the woman before she handed back his cup.

A look of confusion passed her features as she looked in mine. She was probably seeing my future acts of klutziness. "You're life will change drastically soon. Whether it's for better or for the worst, only your actions will decide." Then with a great flurry of exaggerated motions, she left.

Jake and I waited till she was out of range before bursting into laughter. "It sounded more like philosophy in a tea cup then telling the future," he managed between laughter. "You should be careful how you speak to your wife," he mimicked, his voice full of gloom and doom.

Once our laughter was contained, we paid and left. Jake, I'm sure, tipped her generously for our afternoon entertainment.

**A/N: So, I'm not sure if black tea leaves are read or green tea leaves. But since it's a tourist trap anyways, I doubt it really matters. Also, I know this isn't my best chapter but hang in there please. I'll try to update every day until school starts, then it might be every other day. I'm not sure if I'll be updating tomorrow. We might have to euthanize my dog. I've had her for fourteen years and she's not doing well at all. So this might be the end. :'-( If the vet reaches that verdict, then I might not be updating tomorrow simply because I don't want to write or anything. I'm sure you can understand. Anyways, thanks for the support. I'm glad it seems like a lot of people like this story. Please review!**


	5. Chapter 5

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own **_**Twilight.**_

* * *

**EPOV**

"Alice, talk to me," I said quietly as I followed behind her in the woods.

"About, what? We talk all the time, Edward."

It was already seven-thirty in the morning. Alice and I had lost track of time while hunting. Oh well, it's not like we were missing much and she didn't seem too upset about it. I was willing to bet she saw this conversation coming.

"No, we don't," I responded. Now she was just playing dumb and it got on my nerves. "Not like we did before we left Forks."

"Well, of course we don't," she snipped. There was an unexpected amount of venom in her tone, "You expect things to be like they were when she was with us?" She stopped and balled her fists up before turning to glare at me. "You took away my best friend, Edward. I never had a best friend before her. I had you and I had Jasper, but not like a girlfriend you see in the movies. She was that to me. She was so precious to me, Edward. She was so valuable to all of us. We were so happy with her! Granted, Rosalie wasn't, but she was coming around!"

I looked at the ground, unable to meet the ferocity and hurt in her amber eyes.

"You didn't even think about us! You didn't even think about her!"

"Don't be ridiculous, Alice! Of course I thought about her! Every god damned thing I did was for her!" I glared at her. Unshed tears filled her eyes, as I'm sure they did mine as well.

"Like hell you did! You didn't see her after you left!" Her tiny body shook as she took unneeded breaths. "She was so broken, Edward," she added quietly.

I pinched the bridge of my nose. What was I suppose to say? I thought we all had an understanding when I left and why we were leaving. "Alice," I was shocked to here how broken my voice was, "I honestly thought I was doing what was best for her. You're right, I didn't think about the family and I didn't think about you and I'm sorry."

"'I'm sorry' doesn't cut it," I heard her mumble angrily.

I sighed, "I know. 'I'm sorry' doesn't even begin to describe the remorse I feel for hurting you all. I never meant to. I only wanted what was best for Bella."

"How do you know it was the best choice, Edward? Last time I checked, I'm the one that sees the future, not you! We would never hurt her."

"It was more than that. I can't give her children. I can't live a human life with her. I can't provide her with a warm embrace." My shoulders shook in aggravation. "There is so much that she deserves and so much that I can't give her."

I dared to look up at Alice. Her small mouth formed a perfect "o". Apparently, we had not been on the same page like thought.

"Did you," she began slowly, "even ask her? Did you ask if she wanted all that? What she wants and what she deserves are two different matters."

"How would she be able to answer that? She doesn't have enough experience. She doesn't know what she wants."

"She wanted you-"

"She was seventeen, Alice! How could she possibly know what she wanted for the rest of her life, no, for the rest of eternity, at seventeen?"

"She's not a dunce, Edward. Bella's not like other girls. That's what got you so drawn to her in the first place besides the obvious like her scent and closed mind. She could have made an apt judgment."

I shook my head. "It doesn't matter now. That was ten years ago. I can't change anything if I wanted to." I smiled sadly at her. My eyes burned with tears that would never fall. If I could go back, I wouldn't have left her. But it was too late now, far too late. "Come on, our midget minions are waiting for their favorite counselors."

_We're not done with this conversation,_ she said silently.

"I know." I draped my arm around her slender shoulders, and, for the first time in a long, she didn't shove me off.

* * *

**BPOV**

"Mommy, I want to stay with you and Daddy!" Beth tugged backwards on my hand.

"Stop being a whiny butt, Beth. You know she'll make us stay there longer if you whine." Mary was stomping behind us. She preferred the 'silent sulking loud thumping' method over her sister's 'let's whine and cry and piss off Mom' strategy.

"She's right. I do not want whiny children and I'll leave you there if you don't straighten up. Your father and I want a nice day all to ourselves. You have him all the time. I barely ever get to be alone with him. Besides, I bet you'll have lots of fun at the day care camp."

The day care center was located right off of the main lobby and had a whole outdoor playground that was 'woodland fairy' themed. It almost made me wish I was a kid again. But not really. The playground would be a death trap for me. The indoor portion was equally impressive. It had a whole indoor play place, miniature movie theater, and a large recreation room for basket ball. Right now though, it had tables and easels set up in it for creative activities.

"Hi, there!" A plump woman, probably no older than twenty-one, greeted us from behind the front desk of the care center. "I'm Counselor Christie." She looked nice. Her brown hair was modestly pulled back in to a bun and she looked responsible enough.

"Hello, I would like to drop off my bundles of joy for the day," I said sarcastically, both girls just scowled at Christie.

Christie laughed and passed me a clip board. "Of course. If you'd please sign them in here and just make sure to pick them up before nine o'clock. Are you or someone else going to pick them up?"

"Nope, it'll just be me."

"Awwww! Why not Daddy?" Beth moaned loudly.

"Because."

"Because why??"

"Because I said so. Get over it." I stooped down to the same height of the girls. "Now, be good for Miss Christie and the other counselors. I love you and I'll pick you up later."

"Okay," they both mumbled as they gave me the mandatory hug and kiss. "Love you too."

* * *

**EPOV**

"Alright, kiddies! Let's get into a line so we can divide in to groups!" I called the children. Like obedient dogs, most of them came. Of course there was the odd straggler. But most of them were pretty well behaved kids.

_Oh. I hope I can be in Mr. Edward's group again!_ I heard Melissa as she stood line looking up at me.

_Why does Mom have to be so mean? Why do her and daddy need 'alone' time? How boring that must be._

_I bet Mom and Dad are off on some awesome crazy amazing wilderness adventure. Stupid parents. _Ah, siblings how fun. The voices belonged to two little girls I was sure I hadn't seen before even though they looked vaguely familiar.

"Alright!" Alice skimmed over the list. "James Conner, Karen Radcliffe, Melissa Brown and Malory Smith, you're in Edward's group."

Melissa squealed as she bounded over to me.

"Alyssa Harding, Stephen McMasters, Elizabeth and Mary Alice," Alice paused for a second, squinting at the name. A vampire squinting? Her eyes went wide in disbelief. "Black. You're with me."

_OMG! Edward! These are Jacob's kids! You know, for werewolf offspring, they're kinda cute. And the taller one has my name! What are the chances of that?! But they don't smell like wolves. Sure, they're kinda musty, but that must just be from living with their Daddy. Look at them_! She squealed. Thank God vampires don't get migraines. But I might the first to come down with one._ Oh Edward! They're adorable!_

Mary Alice and Elizabeth walked over to Alice as if they owned the place. Just from their posturing, you could tell Mary Alice ran the show.

"Hi, I'm Mary," the brunette child stuck her hand out to Alice.

Alice looked like a kid on Christmas and took Mary's hand. "I'm Alice."

_Wow, she's a weird one. _Mary thought.

"And this," she thumped Elizabeth in the chest, "is my twin." The way the girls stood and behaved reminded me of those old Mafia films.

"Beth," she announced herself, sticking her hand out like her sister.

"Oh, I love your eyes!" Alice exclaimed. It was true. The girl did have unusual eyes. One was the typical dark brown color that most Native Americans had; the other was a dazzling bright and crisp emerald green.

The smaller one, Beth, was getting ready to respond with some smart remark about Alice's behavior until she heard Alice's compliment. "Really?"

"Yes! They're totally awesome!"

Beth's face lit up. "Mary Alice always says they're weird." She glared at her sister.

"Na-uh! Don't be a liar, Elizabeth Rosalie Black!"

"Don't use my whole name! Only Mommy can say it when I'm in trouble! And you're not Mommy or the boss of me! So you shut your mouth, Mary Alice Renee Black!"

_Oh my god, Edward._ _Do you think-_

Oh shit.

* * *

**A/N: I know, very short chapter. I've been under a lot of emotional stress with my dog and all. On a lighter note, she wasn't euthanized. She ate a slice of ham today which is more than what she's eaten in the last four days. . So I'm just going to keep an eye on her the next couple days. If she has a relapse, well then it'd be best for her to be put down. :- ( **

**Once again though, I will try to keep with the chapter-a-day deal because I love you. But only if you keep reviewing. :- P**

**PS Lots of drama and possible lemon next chapter. :-D**


	6. Chapter 6

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own **_**Twilight **_**or **_**Bud Light **_**or the Super Bowl**_**.**_

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews. This is my first lemon, so tell me what you think. :-) **

* * *

**BPOV**

Jake was still at the resort's gym when I came back to the room. Good, that gave me enough time to prepare. I went to the closet to retrieve an inconspicuous plastic bag. The pink Victoria's Secret bag would have more than tipped Jake off. The goal was to be incognito, not be a flashing neon sign.

Quickly I stripped down and put on the lacy red bra and matching boy shorts. I was glad I had already done my hair before taking the girls. My normally straight brown hair, now hung in loose ringlets around my shoulders. After checking myself in the mirror, even I had to admit, I looked good.

After slipping on my white robe, I yanked the sheets off the bed. There was no reason in messing up the resort's nice cotton sheets when I had brought a black and red silk set just for this purpose.

I giggled as I remembered a Super Bowl commercial where a man slid across his wife's silk sheets to get to a Bud Light. But he kept on sliding right out the window, landing stark naked in front of a couple of old ladies. I looked up from putting the sheets on the bed; I was going to make sure the window was shut. With my luck, Jake would slide right out the window. I then remembered we didn't have one.

I gave the room a quick once over after hearing the front door open. Damn, I completely forgot about the candles. Oh well, I doubt Jake would have cared about candles. The outfit would be enough for him.

"Bells?" I heard him sit his gym bag on the table and I dived for the bed.

I managed to crawl up to the pillows and roll over on to my back, propping myself up on my elbows. I untied the white silk robe, 'casually' letting the red lingerie peek through.

"Bella?" I heard him call again.

"In here!"

He opened the door and poked his in. His eyes grew big and a smile slowly crept on his face.

"My, Jake, what big eyes you have," I cooed to him as he climbed on to the bed.

"All the better to see you with, my dear," he responded huskily as he dipped a finger in to the robe. He lazily pulled it away from my lace covered chest. His eyes never left mine as he lowered his head to softly place a kiss above my breast.

He started with one kiss, then another, and one after that, leading a hot warm trial to my lips. My hands wound into his hair holding him close to me. I grazed his lower lip with my tongue and he quickly parted his lips for me. I relished in the feel of his warm tongue against mine. It was always a battle for dominance, I usually always submitted first.

I was vaguely aware of his hands wandering down my body until he cupped my core. My hips arched reflexively against his hot touch.

"God, Bella," He whispered, his hot breath fanned out against my neck. "You're so beautiful."

I could only moan in response as I rubbed against him. Damn these hormones. It'd been too long since our last time.

I growled in frustration when he removed his hand. With his other he was trying to remove the robe, I sat up to help him and quickly removed the robe. Then it dawned on me.

"Jacob Black!"

"What?"

"Get that damned shirt off!" I huffed, my hands shaking as I lifted it up, revealing his beautiful torso to me. I hungrily took in the sight before me. His smooth pecs rose unevenly with his breathing, my eyes roamed lower to his hard stomach and taut sculpted abs.

My hand instinctively ran over his stomach and down the fine trail of dark hair that began at his navel.

"That's more like it," I said breathlessly. He leaned me back against the pillows, reclaiming my mouth with his. I hitched a leg over his hip, pulling him closer to me.

He rocked his hips against me, groaning as my hand cupped his massive manhood through the thin material of his gym shorts. He sucked, nibbled, and licked his way to my breasts while continuously rocking against me. My peaks hardened as he kissed through the material.

"Fuck it," he growled as he ripped the material off of me with his teeth and quickly covered my breast with his mouth. I arched against him as he twirled the hardened peak with his tongue, releasing only to bite down on the tender flesh beside it. I was sure there'd be a mark later. He continued with his ministrations to the other one. I gasped and my hands curled even tighter into his hair, relinquishing his manhood as he forcefully pushed against me.

"Jacob!" I screeched as he moved away from me. "What the hell?"

"Roll over," he commanded. I could feel myself pooling for him as he took charge. Instantly, I rolled over, getting on my hands and knees. I felt his massive hands run up my back side, massaging each cheek as he leaned over and kissed my back. He pressed against me and his hands ran up my back then over my sides to cup my breasts. His nose pressed in to the back of my neck as he kissed and nipped me.

Reluctantly, he moved away from me. Then, not so reluctantly, he pulled the boy shorts down at painfully slow pace.

"Jake, just rip them off," I gasped. I had never been one for foreplay. I wanted him _now._

"No," he growled, "I like them." Next thing I knew, his hands gripped the head board above me. He leaned his head next to mine. "Do you have any idea how good your ass looks in those?" He was breathing heavy. Lust dripped from every word. I swallowed hard. I couldn't speak, I just shook my head. Jake kissed my neck hard at first, then softening as he rolled me over gently with his hands.

The boy shorts dangled at my ankles and he gently removed them, tossing them to the side before nudging my knees open with his face.

I shook my head. "No," I managed to choke out. I was aching so badly for him that it physically pained me to close my legs. He looked at me puzzled. "Shorts. First," I breathed out. It was becoming increasingly difficult to form coherent thoughts. But I wanted those shorts gone.

He grinned and removed the loose gym shorts. His large erection sprang out and I had to remind myself to breath. He nudged my legs apart for him. Gripping my thigh gently, he placed one over his shoulder and then the other. _God, finally we're getting somewhere,_ was all I could think. I was just waiting for him to position himself at my entrance, and then I could finally possess that god of a man.

I closed my eyes for just a moment, only to have them shoot open as his mouth took my sensitive nub in his mouth. I gasped and arched in surprise as he began pumping me with two fingers and then three. I reflexively rocked my aching core against his hands and tongue. Fuck, it was nice, but not what I wanted.

"Jake!" I managed, "I need you!" I was coming dangerously close to climaxing. All this teasing had sent me to close to the edge. I could feel the pressure, coiling tighter and tighter. "Please," I begged, "Please." My hands had wound tight in to the bed sheets on either side of me. I needed something, anything to hold on to and keep me grounded.

Thank God he took pity on me. He pulled his fingers out and I almost shouted for him not to stop, I ached so badly, I need some kind of release. Anything would be better than nothing.

To my relief, he braced his arms on either side of my waist. Slowly he pushed into me. I don't know why the fuck he was going so slow, I was wet and ready. This was no time to be gentle.

My head rolled back in pleasure as he filled my entire cavity till I could feel him at my end. He pulled back slowly before sliding in again with more force. I couldn't stay still, the pleasure urging me to move, to somehow increase it. My hands left the sheet and began running up and down his biceps.

"Oh, god, Jacob," I moaned, "Faster. Please."

I gripped his arms tighter as he picked up the pace. I was beyond the realm of reason and common sense as my moans echoed throughout the room.

"Oh, shit," I whispered as I clenched my eyes shut. My body clenched around him to the point of pain. Spasms rocked through my body as I was finally released from my body. In the midst of my floating limbs, I was faintly aware of Jake's simultaneous orgasm. His body stilled after one final thrust, emptying himself inside of me. I couldn't help but smile as he slowly lowered himself onto me, nuzzling my neck lovingly.

I sighed as he gently removed himself, rolling over to his side and clutching me to him. We stayed like that for a while, touching and kissing each other lovingly now and then before he fell asleep.

Pillow talk wasn't something we partook in. Normally we were too wrapped in each other for words. He shifted on to his stomach, wrapping one arm lazily around my waist. I should have felt whole, completed, you know? I guess I'm just one of those insecure types after sex. The feeling of bliss usually left after Jake fell asleep. They always say your best thoughts can quickly lead to your worst and it did for me.

I rolled over to my side, facing away from Jacob. I bit my nails out of habit, just thinking. I wondered where he was right now. If he even thought of me or even cared if I married and slept with a werewolf.

Tears silently rolled down my face as I realized the cold reality of it: He didn't care. None of them did. Not Esme or Carlisle or Emmett or Jasper. Not even Alice. She would have seen all of this and, through her, Edward would have seen it too. None of them cared. I was just a phase for them.

I brought my knees as close to my chest as I could and clutched the blankets tighter around myself. I squeezed my eyes shut, attempting to block out the evil thoughts threatening to ruin my carefully constructed life.

* * *

**EPOV**

I shook my head in disbelief. There was no way these were Bella's children. There… She… Why? I left to protect her, and she marries a fucking werewolf?! She was safer with me!

My jaw clenched tightly as my fists balled. Alice looked at me, worry invading her ocher eyes.

_Edward, are you okay? We still don't know. It could… It could just be some horrible freak coincidence._

Alice somehow quelled the fighting between the girls. I don't know how. I wasn't paying attention. My head was swirling with memories of prom and of Jacob Black dancing with her. I wasn't that jealous at the time. I knew he liked her, but he wasn't a wolf. And she was mine! She loved me! I tried to regulate my unnecessary breaths.

_Is Mr. Edward alright? _Melissa sounded genuinely concerned.

_He looks just like that guy we found photos of at Grandpa Charlie's house. _I looked up to find Elizabeth appraising me. _I wonder why Daddy didn't like him. I wonder if Mary thinks they look alike. Maybe it's just me._

I shook my head, trying to block out the images of the little girl and her sister in Bella's old room. I could hear the voices of Jacob and Bella laughing below as the girls rummaged through their mother's belongings.

"Hey! Mary Alice! Come look at this!" Beth had a flashlight and was shining in between a floor board that had come loose. "I think there's stuff down here!"

Mary thumped over and helped her sister remove the board. Carefully, they pulled out the black bag I had put all of our memories in.

They began picking through the artifacts before them. Each took and inspected the photos of their mother, their grandfather, and myself. Mary reached for something on the pile, her body was blocking Beth's view.

"Hmmm, what's this?" Mary held out the CD of my music for Beth's inspection.

Beth gently took the disc, turning it this way and that. "I think it's one of those old CD thingies. Remember? Mommy has a whole collection of them."

"Oh, yeah," Mary Alice nodded in recognition.

"Hmmmm," Beth looked closer at the disc. "It doesn't look scratched. I wonder…" She began looking around the room. "Oh!" She exclaimed as her eyes settled on Bella's old stereo. "See? It goes in here." She put the CD in and pressed play. The tune of Bella's lullaby began to play loudly.

"Bells?" I could hear Charlie's voice laced with concern below. "Are you alright?"

"Bella?" Jake echoed his… his… father-in-law's concern.

There was a lot of bustling before Jake's feet were heard coming up the stairs. "Girls," he looked worriedly around the room. His eyes frantically searched for the stereo. Leaning over to it, he pushed the stop button.

"What are you girls doing?"

Beth momentarily panicked, not knowing if she was in trouble or not. Jake's eyes settled on the photos of Bella took of us and he scooped them up to put them back into the bag. "You girls shouldn't be snooping around here," his voice was frantic.

"Daddy?" Beth started tentatively, "Who's that man in the photos?"

"No one," Jake stated angrily, "He's dead." He put the bag back beneath the floorboards. Going back over to the stereo, he took the CD out, and threw it on top of the bag. "Don't talk to Mommy about any of this," He wagged his finger at them. Beth had never seen him so angry. "I mean it, girls. Not about the guy in the photos, or the stuff you found. It was beneath the floorboards for a reason." Both girls nodded and the memory faded.

I shook my head to Alice, whispering, "No, they're hers."

_Are you sure?_

I managed a nod.

Alice looked at me sympathetically. _Go take a walk, Edward. I can have Faye cover for you._ I didn't need to hear the suggestion twice.

* * *

**A/N: **

**FAQ**

**Q. Why doesn't Edward realize Bella is at the resort?**

**A. He's too in shock right now over the fact that she has children at all. He loves Bella as strongly as he did when he left her. Although he expected her to move on, he didn't actually prepare himself for it. Poor Edward's just in shock and isn't thinking clearly.**

**Q. Does Bella actually love Jacob?**

**A. Yes, she does. I won't say anymore. I might give away future story details. But I will tell you it's like a messed up tangled ball of yarn with a lot of knots that need to be untied. So, fear not Edward lovers! On the same note, fear not Jacob lovers! I'll take care of you both. :-) **


	7. Chapter 7

**DISCLAIMER: I still don't own **_**Twilight.**_

**A/N: Sorry for the cliffhanger. Believe it or not, this was a difficult chapter to write and I kept getting distracted while writing it. I do not think it is my best at all. Next chapter sparks will fly. I'll try to update tomorrow but I have a doctor's appointment, so don't kill me if I can't. :-P**

**EPOV**

I didn't walk, I ran. I ran deep into the Alaskan wilderness, as far as I could, as hard as I could. When I finally stopped, it was because of the mountain in front of me. And I honestly didn't feel the need to climb any mountains today. My mind was in too much turmoil for concentrating on navigating an untouched mountain.

_Holy fuck. She's married… _Both of my hands ran through my hair as I looked to the heavens imploring them to tell me why. Why did I deserve so cruel of a joke? I left her to keep her safe, and she marries the one thing more unpredictable than a vampire. I pinched the bridge of my nose, clamping my eyes shut and attempted to will away this nightmare.

_Positives. Think of the positives, Edward,_ I told myself. _She was married. So she… moved on. Which is what I wanted._ _Damnit! I meant for her to marry a human! Stop it, Edward. Positives. She has children. Two beautiful girls, something I could have never gave her. She can be normal. As normal as being married to a mutt can get, but its more normal than being married to a vampire._ The last revelation was like being stabbed with a screw driver. Note: Screw drive not knife. The cut was far from clean. It was jagged and irregular. If I was a werewolf, we may have had a chance. I still could have given her everything a human husband could. Jacob Black has the best of both worlds.

I settled onto a log and buried my face in my hands. My thoughts were in a haze. I thought leaving Bella would be a clean break, for both of us. It was just a clean break for her.

_Snap out of it, _I nodded my head, _This is what you wanted. You knew you weren't going to heal. Just be happy for her. She can live without you._

Then I remembered something.

_Emmet and I were standing in the woods, ready to make our way back to the resort._

_"You know," he started off slowly. _

_"What?" I wasn't in the mood to read his mind._

_"Jacob Black's here."_

_I looked at him as we walked at a human pace. "So? What about it?"_

_Emmett shrugged, "I dunno. He's a werewolf. I thought it was interesting."_

_I took a peek to see if that was it. And it was, just Jacob Black checking in for his wife and two children._

'His wife and two children'. The phrase echoed in my head. Jacob was married to my Bella. Bella, his wife, was here. Bella was at the resort. My God, my Bella was back.

It was if the heavens had opened to show me their glory. For the first time in long time I felt hopeful and light. My Bella was home, I could see her again.

My first instinct was to run back to the resort. To find Jacob's room number and whisk her away. Unfortunately, we weren't dealing with her and Jacob as an item but as a married _couple with_ children.My jovial mood instantly dissipated. There was nothing I could do. She was married. She'd moved on. I couldn't intervene in her life and expect her to walk away from her fairy tale ending. It just wasn't fair to her. I did this to us. It was my burden to bear, not hers.

**BPOV**

After deciding that sleep wasn't going to come and the wall wasn't going to change colors from me staring, I untangled myself from Jacob. His snores filled the room. I hope our neighbors couldn't hear him. Maybe I should turn him on his side, he snores less then.

Light streamed through the French doors. The sun finally decided to peek through for a couple hours. Seattle's annual rain fall was three feet, here it was thirteen feet. No wonder _he_ wanted to move here.

I moved around the room, collecting our discarded clothes and clean clothes for myself. I needed to pick up the girls, maybe go to the spa afterwards. I chose some faded blue jeans, a Florida Gator's t-shirt (Renee sent it for Christmas, I have no idea why), and a hoodie. No need to be fancy to pick up some rug rats.

I turned the shower on as hot as it would go, eager to wash the sticky grime of sex off. My muscles instantly relaxed when the water hit my shoulders. Man, did it feel good. Quickly I washed my hair and body. I wanted to leave before Jacob woke up and took me back to bed.

I pulled a blanket over Jacob's sleeping form in case he was asleep when the girls and I came home. No need for them to ask more than they already do.

"Mommy!" I heard Beth shriek as I walked into the day care center. She was playing with a black haired child on the floor. Her playmate looked up, her topaz eyes locking on mine. She was a playmate, but she was no child.

My heart stopped in my chest and I suddenly felt nailed to the floor. _Oh my god, it can't be. _But it was. There was no mistake, my children I had been playing with Alice.

Tears of anger, happiness, disgust, joy, I don't know what other emotions, filled my eyes, threatening to spill over. _They're here, they're here, they're here, _was all my mind seemed capable of chanting. Large black splotches began to cloud my vision.

"Mommy?" Beth was latched to one hand, Mary Alice on the other. "Mommy, breath!"

On command, air filled my lungs. The intake of oxygen opened my mind for some form of thought. Quickly, I turned on my heel and walked out, dragging the girls behind me.

I heard the doors open behind me. "Bella! Wait!" I shook my head, no I wasn't going to talk to them. This was all some kind of dream. Some kind of twisted effed up dream.

"But, Mommy!" Beth began to protest, "I want you to meet my new friend!"

"Yeah," Mary chimed in, "Her name's Mary Alice too! And she likes Beth's eyes!"

I ignored them and kept walking. I couldn't help but feel like my life was spiraling out of control. For the first time in a long time, I had no idea what to do. I wanted so badly to run to Alice, to touch her, talk to her, anything to confirm my sanity or insanity. By the same token, I was petrified of hearing confirmation of what I'd been suspicious of for so long. I don't think my heart could handle being pulverized like that.

I couldn't get to the room soon enough. I locked the door behind me.

"Mommy?" Mary asked, she sounded upset. I turned to look at her. Her brown eyes were filled with tears. "Did we do something wrong?"

I looked at Beth who wore the same depressed expression.

"Oh no, baby," I knelt in front of them, "I'm not mad at you guys. You haven't done anything wrong. I'm just," I looked for a word. "Frazzled."

"Frazzled?"

I nodded. "Why don't you girls go see what's on tv."

I walked over to our bedroom and knocked loudly. "Jake! Get you're butt up! I'm going to the spa!"

If there was one thing I knew, I was in need of pampering. After hearing a grunt from the bed room, I high tailed it to the spa.

Two frosted glass doors closed the anxiety filled outsiders from the pampered pets within. I wanted to be one of those pets. I wanted to forget about all my worries. Just like the plaque on the door said.

I tried to put my best smile on as I opened the door and strode to the desk, a tall blonde was blocking my view. She looked like a ritzy client. Damn, she's probably high maintenance too. Oh well, I'm here now. I can wait. I'll be pampered.

The door clanged loudly behind me. The blonde turned to look, revealing this wasn't just any blonde. This was the Rosalie Hale. Her conversational companions? Esme and Alice. Shit. Today is not my day.

Rosalie stood there and gawped at me, I couldn't quite gauge her expression. Alice and Esme made their advanced. Then the world went black.

"Bella, honey?"

I was laying face up on something hard and cold. I had no idea what happened. Did I trip again? Something brushed against my face.

My eyes fluttered open, only to have a pair of topaz eyes staring down at me. It took me a minute to realize it was Esme. Her long caramel brushed me face as she looked down on me. I was laying in her lap.

"This can't be happening," I groaned and closed my eyes. I opened them again, nope Esme was still there.

Her lips were in a hard line, worried creased her forehead as she looked down at me.

"Well, dear, we didn't think it would either," she began quietly, "But it did, and here you are." She beamed down at me and I pushed myself up to take in my surroundings.

We were in a sitting room. Everything was soothing beige, from the ceiling to the walls to the carpet. Wall sconces gave a soft comforting light to the room. The furniture was more of an off white or cream color. Three pieces were set up around a mahogany coffee table: an empty loveseat, then the couch Esme and I currently occupied, and a second loveseat where Alice sat. She had brought her legs up beneath her chin. She watched me, rocking slightly back and forth while chewing on her lower lip. Worry was etched on every feature. Rosalie stood a couple feet behind the occupied loveseat. Her arms were folded gracefully over her chest, where the other two had looked worried, she did nothing but scowl.

There was an awkward moment of silence before Esme stood and held her hand out to me. "Well, dear, I'm assuming you came here to get pampered?"

I nodded my head. The carpet had become very interesting.

"Would you mind is Alice joined you?"

I looked up at Esme. My eyes were wide.

"You two have been apart for so long," Esme back tracked. I was hit with a pang of guilt, I did't mean to be rude. "I thought you'd like to catch up. But it's your vacation-"

I quickly shook my head and cut her off. "No, Esme, I'd love for Alice to join me," I said quietly, but I knew they had heard.

Maybe I blinked, I don't know. They were there and then they were gone. Stupid, fast vampires. Well, Alice wasn't gone. She still sat the loveseat. Slowly she stood.

"Shall we?" For the first time in my memory, Alice actually looked shy.

I stood and followed her.

"So what do you want to have done?" She asked after a rather uncomfortable silence.

My mind seemed to be working in slow motion. "Um, something where we can be alone."

She nodded. "Esme," she spoke even though Esme was nowhere near us, "We're going to have a hydro therapy soak. I'll prep it, don't worry about it."

Alice led me into a back room holding two large tubs. "You're daughters," she started as she poured in some salts and started the jets, "are adorable." She looked up at me, smiling. I couldn't help be return it.

"Yeah," I said slowly, twirling a strand of hair in my fingers, "They're a couple of characters."

The silence began again and she handed me a robe to change. When I came back out, she was already in the water. I slid into the tub next to her. I took a deep breath, it was now or never. "Alice?"

She looked over at me.

"Was I really just a phase for you?"


	8. Chapter 8

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own **_**Twilight.**_

**A/N: I lied, Mamato. Here's to you, dear. :-) **

**BPOV**

Alice looked like a fish out of water. Her jaw hung open and she silently stared at me. Why in the world did my question throw her off balance? She closed her mouth, her eyes narrowing at me.

"A phase?" She echoed in disbelief. "Isabella Marie Swan! You think you were just a _phase_ to us?"

Sheepishly, I nodded my head.

"You're my best friend, Bella!" Both of her tiny hands clenched the side of the tub as she looked at me. "When Edward made us leave," she began her voice picking up intensity. She was becoming the animated Alice I knew, not the meek child-like creature that was in the sitting room a short time before. "When he made us leave, I-" she searched for words, "Argh!" she exclaimed, her fists slapping the water. "I was soooo mad at him! How dare he pull me away from you?!" Her brow creased in anger as she lost herself in her rant. "I was so pissed! If there was anytime I would have even thought about murdering him, it was then!"

I was shocked. I didn't know what to think. So this was allhis fault? "What about the others?" I whispered.

She sighed and leaned back into the tub. "Well, Esme wasn't happy at all, but she accepted the decision since Edward 'knew' what he was doing. " She put air quotes around the word 'knew'. "Carlisle tried to have him stay a little longer, but he eventually persuaded Carlisle as well. Jasper blames himself for it all and willingly went. Rose was, well, she was Rose. Emmett was angry though." Her ocher eyes held a far off look before she turned them to me, "None of us wanted to leave you, Bella. Not even Edward."

I snorted at his name and the tears began to fall. "He left me, Alice. He left me to alone in those woods and left." I shook my head, he had wanted to leave. I had been nothing more than a toy. I heard it straight from the horse's mouth. "He never wanted me like I thought he did. He never loved me like I thought."

"Bella, don't be ridiculous. I know what he told you and it was all a lie."

I shook my head. I knew it was true, he didn't love me. "If he did, he would have never let me marry Jacob," I said quietly.

"Bella!" She groaned, "We never knew about him! I thought for a while you might have been dead after throwing yourself off that cliff! But I waited and then I saw you again. It's been like a bad television channel. Sometimes you're there and sometimes you're not. We never knew anything about Jacob. I never saw him in my visions!"

"You didn't?"

"No, Bella, I didn't."

"Oh," was all I could come up with, "I missed you," I said, my voice laced with emotion.

"I missed you too."

"So, what happen after you all left?"

"Well," she stared up at the ceiling, "Esme and Carlisle moved here and built an exact replica of the house in Forks. Rose and Emmett stayed at various resorts before buying a private a private island in the Aegean Sea. Jasper took me shopping in Europe. And Edward hunted for Victoria."

"Why?" I couldn't stop the question from leaving my mouth. _ Why on Earth would he put himself in danger like that?_

"To keep you safe," she whispered. "That's why we left. He thought it'd be safer for you if we left." She took a deep breath, "Anyways, he never found her-"

"I know," I whispered.

She looked over at me, "What do you mean 'I know'?"

"I know because Jake killed her." Her jaw hung open. I continued, "She and Laurant are both dead. The pack killed them when they came back to Forks."

Her mouth made a small 'o'. "Well, Edward will be relieved to hear that."

"Why would he care?"

"Did you not just hear what I said? About him going after Victoria?"

"Alice, maybe she did something else to him, maybe he wasn't chasing her at all. It was just an excuse."

"He loves you, Bella! It was not an excuse! He's been a wreck without you!"

"Don't tell me his pity story like I was the one that left, Alice! He left me! If he was so damned heartbroken then why didn't he come back? Why are you talking to me instead of him?" Angry tears streaked down my face, this bath was anything **but** relaxing. "I'll tell you why!" I stood in the tub to climb out, "Because he doesn't give a damn! He never did! I'm not stupid. I knew he was too good to be true. That our love was too good to be true."

I stepped out of the tub and went to the changing room, quickly redressing. I heard a commotion outside the changing room. It was probably Alice wanting me to stop. I didn't care. Jake was right, we should have left. _Wait, Jake knew they were here. He didn't tell me. Never mind that now, I'll talk to him later. After we leave._

I threw the door open, ready for Alice's assault, only to trip and fall in my haste. The beige floor rushed up to meet me. Then it stopped. I was vaguely aware of the cold, stone arms around me. My mind was inundated with that scent. _His_ scent. I felt my body being maneuvered slowly, gently, around in those arms until I was facing a forest green buttoned shirt. My heart, beating frantically against my ribs by this 

point, nearly gave out when a slender finger tipped my chin up. My eyes shut tight as I willed myself to breath. _My god this can't be happening, it isn't happening. It's not him. Jasper, Emmett, or Carlisle, but not __**him**__. He wouldn't care enough. Bella, don't get your hopes up, you're being irrational. He doesn't love you, he never did._ Convinced I had a grip on my emotions, I slowly opened my eyes, only to have them met with the Adonis of my wildest dreams.

"Bella."

**EPOV**

I had finally reached my painful conclusion. I'd stay away from her. I slowly made my way back to the resort, not eager to be interrogated by Alice and disappointing her with my decision. This morning had looked so promising. We had finally begun talking and sorting out what went wrong with us. I couldn't bear to have her close up to me again.

No matter what direction my selfish desires longed to take me, I would not give in. If Bella was truly as broken as Alice had described to me time and time again, Bella more than deserved this happiness after I royally screwed up our chances. She had two beautiful daughters, and, even if they did belong to a mutt, it was more than I could ever give her. Maybe, though, maybe I could at least watch her.

_No, _I sighed, _The dog would smell me._

I was stuck with my decision. I had let her go. I gave her up for all time. There were no re-dos, take backs, or second chances with that decision.

I entered the day care center. I was depressed to learn that the Blacks had already been signed out. The girls were adorable; I wanted to become friends with them, to have some sort of connection to Bella. Maybe they'd tell her about me. _Don't be ridiculous. You're dead to them,_ I had to remind myself. What was shocking though was Alice was nowhere to be found. Christie informed me that she and Faye had been taking care of the five remaining children when Alice abruptly clocked out. I, too, took the rest of the day off, going on the hunt for Alice.

As I made my way through the corridors, her intoxicating scent filled the air. I stood for a moment, to adjust and rein my lusts. Ten years had not made her blood's call weaker. _Alice, find Alice._ I shook my head, to my dismay and elation, Alice appeared to be on the same trail as Bella.

The glass doors were my last barrier. This was it. Could I control myself to just finding Alice? I didn't know. Either way, I wasn't entirely sure if I didn't want to run into Bella. It was a slightly dishonest proposal, but who the hell cares? I may be a vampire, but I'm still a man. I opened the doors. My ears instantly heard my angel's voice from the back rooms.

I think Esme and Rosalie were at the reception desk. I didn't notice. Alice was there with her.

Bella's words ripped through my heart. _It was all lies! How could she believe me? After all the times I said I loved her, showed her that I loved her. One lie was all it took._

I heard the splashing of water. I let myself into the room where Alice stood in a robe, shaking her head at me. I thought of leaving, until Bella's door open.

My mind didn't even register that I should leave as she tripped. Instantly my arms were around her. We were both frozen in shock. I stood there for a moment, still as possible, her blood was still a powerful call to me. I slowly turned her towards me, silently praying she wouldn't faint. Her heart was beating erratically. She squeezed her eyes shut as I lifted her face towards mine. Slowly, her beautiful lids opened, her large doe eyes took me in.

"Bella," I sighed. I was home again.

**A/N: Short angsty sweet chapter. Lol. My arm feels like it's about to pop off. I had to go get an HPV shot today and that was a mother big needle. xD Anyways, hope you're still liking the story. Thanks for sticking with me this far. :-)**


	9. Chapter 9

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own **_**twilight.**_

**A/N: I'm going out this weekend. So no updates. Sorry. :-) **

**BPOV**

I couldn't stop the tears from flowing. My hands clutched to the fabric of his shirt as I buried my head in his chest. His arms wrapped more securely around my waist, less of a restraint, more of an embrace.

He lowered his head to rest in the curve where my neck meets the shoulder and inhaled deeply. "I've missed you so much," he choked out.

_I've missed you,_ I kept replaying his voice over and over. Even during my engagement, still did dangerous activities just to hear that velvet voice. That beautiful amazing voice. I only stopped my daredevil escapades after my wedding day, trying, with every fiber of my being, to be a good wife to Jacob.

We might have stood there, holding each other, for days or hours or minutes, maybe even seconds. It seemed like an eternity to me, a blissful eternity. Slowly though, I leaned back away from him. His topaz eyes were filled with worry as I lifted my hand to the center of chest and slowly pushed him, hoping he got the idea. He did, and his arms fell away from my waist.

I was an adult now. I could do this. I attempted to steady my breathing. There were many things we needed to discuss and I couldn't let myself get distracted. I had to be able to see through the lies he might weave.

"Edward," his name sounded like a prayer from my lips. I cringed, knowing that his power over me had never waned. I couldn't bring myself to look at his face. _You can do this Bella._ "We," my voice caught in my throat. _We_, it sent a painful rip through my chest. We were not a 'we' anymore. _Oh God I can't do this._ I heard the truth once and it nearly, literally killed me. I couldn't handle hearing the ugly words 'I don't love you' from his beautiful lips again. "I have to go," I whispered, my eyes completely focused on the floor as I turned away from him, nearly running out of the spa.

I ran like the coward I was. To my surprise, I didn't trip once. It's amazing what adrenaline can do for one's coordination. I ran out of the resort, to the direction of boardwalk trail. I couldn't go back to my room, Jacob would ask what was wrong and I couldn't do that to him. I couldn't drag him into this. He wouldn't look for me for another hour maybe two, at the least.

I didn't notice my surroundings until I couldn't run any farther. My chest heaved in attempts to reclaim lost oxygen, fighting against my fatigued body and heavy sobs. I leaned against a fence post and sank to the floor, running my fingers through my hair.

I ran from him. The man that had plagued my dreams for ten years had been holding me, telling me he missed me. I had my chance to ask him if he loved me, to at least, maybe give him a farewell kiss if he didn't. Instead I shoved him away and ran.

I pulled my knees up to my chest, wrapping arms around them, trying to keep myself together. My sides felt like they were coming apart. I hadn't felt this bad since that day. Except there was no one to blame this time, only myself. I threw what was most likely my only chance to talk to him one more time. God I was so stupid! I squeezed my eyes shut and began rocking back forth in a vain instinctual attempt to comfort myself.

I desperately longed for arms to hold me. A loving embrace, safe from the world in arms made of cold stone. I was so selfish. My husband had loved me through all of my problems. My problem comes home and I nearly throw it all away.

I knew I should have gone to the room, gone back to Jacob. But how could I? How could I while knowing he had always only been my best friend, my source of comfort, not my soul mate?

I had never made love to Jacob. Every time we had sex, it was something that was purely physical for me. I never had the deep satisfaction that, supposedly, women were supposed to have after sex with their husbands. I always felt dirty, eager to take a shower after the act. How horrible was I? I could have left Jacob alone, told him no, let him find some other woman that could wholly devote herself to him_. Don't be silly. He knew what he was getting into. How many times had you told him that you were broken? Unfixable? That a part of you would __always__ love Edward. Too many times to count. But I had never been completely honest with him. I was a liar. A part of me wouldn't always love Edward. All of me would always love Edward. There was no real, honest to God part to give to Jacob outside of friendship. I have always been unconditionally and irrevocably in love with Edward. Regardless of what he did to me. He could kill me, and I would still die happy as long as I was in his arms when it happened. There was nothing that could stop me from loving him._ A violent round of sobs racked my body when I realized I had been unfaithful to Jacob from the very beginning.So much for my great Alaskan adventure. It was just a huge nightmare.

Soft foot falls invaded my thoughts. I didn't look up, willing the passerby to leave me in peace. I felt the person slide to the ground next to me and small marble arms reached around my back and pulled me close. I allowed myself to lean against her lap, my head against her cold chest with no heart beat to be heard.

"I'm sorry, Bella," Alice's voice was soft as she rubbed soothing circles on my back, "I didn't know he was coming. I was too wrapped up in our conversation. I wasn't looking."

"It's okay," I sniffled, "Welcome to the world of normal people." I half smiled against her chest, trying to lighten our moods.

"He shouldn't have sneaked up on us like that. I should have had some warning to give you. I'm sorry for him startling you," she kept apologizing. I didn't understand why, logic should have told me he would be at the resort as well. I should have been prepared. It wasn't Alice's responsibility to warn me.

"It's okay," I whispered.

She sighed and leaned back against the fence, letting me slide farther down into her lap. I had no desire or energy to sit up.

"It'll all be okay, Bella," she said gently, "Everything's going to work out. Don't worry."

**EPOV**

Alice just glared at me as my love ran away. My instinct was to run after her, to pull her back into my arms and confess my love and confess that what I had said in the woods was a horrible lie.

_Edward, don't. _Alice growled in my head. She really let me have it once Bella was out of range.

"How dare you, Edward! I thought you were going to leave her alone! You could have knocked, or warned us, or something!"

"I'm not the one that can see the future, Alice," I snapped at her. My arms missed Bella's warmth instantly.

"Yeah, well, I had seen your decision to leave her alone. So I focused on her and her needs. Unlike some people, I actually care about what's going through her mind!" She turned to leave at a human pace.

"Alice, wait!" I pleaded with her. I needed her to help me. I needed my sister.

To my surprise, she flipped me the bird.

_Don't follow, Edward. I'm going to find her. And I swear if you sneak up on us again, I will __**not**__ arrange a meeting for you!_ She sounded serious, so I backed down.

"I'm holding you to that," I whispered.

_Just trust me._

* * *

I ran my hands through my hair as I paced the floor in my room. I could hear the voices below.

"Isn't it great that Bella's back?" Esme was saying to Carlisle, "And her children are gorgeous!"

She was trying to be quiet, but it didn't matter, I'd hear her in my mind anyways.

"How's Edward taking it?" Carlisle softly asked her.

She hesitated. "I don't know. I know he's excited, but he surprised her," she said slowly, "Alice is doing damage control. She's pretty sure everything will work out to the extent they can at least have a friend ship." She paused, "She's unsure of anything more. She still has trouble seeing her, you know."

The front door opened. _Edward!_ Alice's voice sang in my head.

"Hello, dear, how's Bella?" I heard Esme ask.

"She's fine," Alice responded flippantly, running up the stairs. She didn't bother knocking as she came in, depositing herself on the couch. She patted the seat beside her and I sat down.

"Tomorrow the day care will be hosting a Father-Daughter dance," she began.

"Since when?"

"Since I arranged it," she said matter-of-factly. "Now shut up and listen. I've also arranged for there to be a mother spa retreat, which of course, that I personally invited Bella by sending an invitation to her suite. Mr. Black will have no reason to wonder where his wife is while he's at the dance. She already knows that instead of the retreat, she will actually be with you." _She was not easy to work with. You owe me big time, mister. Don't think I'll forget._

"Sh-she'll talk with me?" I was stunned. Elated, stunned, and terrified. I had no idea what I was going to say to her. What would possibly be good enough to say to her.

"Were you not listening?" She smirked, raising a mischievous eyebrow. Leaning over, she patted me on the leg. "Everything will be fine. Stop worrying."

"Do you **know** everything will be fine?"

She scowled. Her spotty visions of Bella had more than angered and frustrated her the last ten years. 'No, I haven't had a vision if that's what you're saying. But I talked to her, and she still loves you." She gave me a reassuring smile. "Only heaven knows why she could still love **you**. You're not much to look at," she joked.

I pulled her into a hug. "Thank you, Alice," I whispered.

She pulled back after a moment, "You owe me."

I couldn't help but grin. "I know."


	10. Chapter 10

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own **_**Twilight.**_

**A/N: Sorry about the delay, had writer's block and life to deal with. This is a very short chapter and I'm sorry. I felt like I needed to give you all something. I'm working through my writer's block still. lol. Feel free to bounce ideas around how the meeting should go with me! Just PM me. :-)**

**BPOV**

I walked along the board walk for another thirty minutes after Alice left. My mind was absolutely reeling.

_Edward, loving me? Impossible._ I tried to tell myself something like never even existed. His supposed love for me was all a lie. And, yet, try as I might to squander it, a tug in my heart kept telling me otherwise. Logic took one side, emotion took the other. It sounded like a plot for Hollywood's next big Blockbuster.

I ran my hands through my once curly hair. The weather had caused it return to its normal limp and bodiless state. _This is crazy! Alice is crazy!_ I shook my head and covered my face with my hands. I **will not** talk to Edward Anthony Masen Cullen. He **will not** interfere with my perfect life.

The tears returned. It was so hard to walk away from him. The look on his face when he saw me, I had seen that expression so many times on Jake. Edward's face held nothing but love for me_. But he couldn't love me! He never did! Don't ruin your marriage when you know he'll only leave again!_

I groaned in agony. I could literally feel my heart tearing in two.

_Meet Edward in room 204. Make sure Jake and the girls are at the dance. You guys need to talk. Please, Bella, please do this for both you and Edward,_ I heard Alice's voice in my memories. All I had to do was tell the girls about the father-daughter dance, and then they'd make him go. _It's not like I'm cheating. I mean, I do need to talk to Edward. For closure. We both need that. _I attempted convince myself that I could do this, that I was in my rights and morals to do this.

For all my convincing, though, I could not shake the feeling that what I was doing would have very, very bad consequences. I breathed through my nose and out my mouth in a desperate attempt to calm myself on the way back to our suite. I paused briefly in front of a mirror to assess the physical damage my encounter had done to my appearance. The blotchy stains from crying were nearly gone. If Jake asked, I could say it was just a side effect of the facial I had gotten. My brown hair stuck out of the black hair tie. Quickly I redid my pony tail. Other than that, there wasn't much I needed to high.

* * *

The door flew open as soon as my hand touched it. "Mommy!!" Elizabeth squealed as she pulled me inside. "Guess what, Mommy?"

I shook my head in a daze as she pushed me to the couch, "What?"

"Miss Christie called our room to tell us there's a dance tonight!" Mary Alice yelled as she bounded into the sitting room. I internally groaned, so Alice did not make the meeting optional.

"Mary Alice!" Beth screeched and launched a pillow from the couch at her sister's head. "ARGH! You always tell her!" She whined, "Why can't you let me do it for once?"

"Because you're too slow," Mary responded, followed by maturely sticking out her tongue.

"Oh, I see," I stated absentmindedly. I was intent on ignoring their hostility. I was too emotionally drained at this point and in no mood to handle petty arguments.

"Hey, Bells," Jake came in wearing a pair of khaki pants, his hair was still damp from the shower. He gently kissed my cheek before continuing to squeegee his hair with the resort's white towel. "How was the spa?"

"Huh? Oh, it was great. I loved it," I attempted to sound enthusiastic. It must've worked.

"Great! Would you want to go back?"

_I got gypped on my treatment, met my former heart throb, nearly cheated on my husband, then proceeded to rip said heart throb's heart out by walking away from him after he admitted he missed me. It was awesome! Why wouldn't I want to go back?_ These were the words I wished to say. But instead, I settled for the witty remark of, "It's a spa, why wouldn't I go back?"

A smile covered the faces of all three. "Awesome!" They managed to yell in unison. Family bonds, crazy. "You see, the girls really wanted to go to that father-daughter dance and I figured maybe you'd want to go to the spa again so you'd have something to do," Jake continued. "I mean, if you'd rather us not-"

I cut him off, smiling at him. "No, Jake, it's fine. I'm sure the girls will have a blast."

"Great," he sounded relieve, "I guess I'll get the girl's ready then."

They looked up at him in horror. I honestly chuckled, "No, Jake, I think maybe I should get them ready."

Mary Alice let out an audible sigh. "Thank goodness for you, Mommy. Who knows what mismatched outfit he'd put us in! We'd probably clash!" She said as I herded them into the room.

"Clash? Do you even know what that means?" I asked as I began pulling their outfits from the drawers.

"Yes. It means you outfits don't match and the colors make it look like someone tossed their cookies on you."

I looked over to where she sat on the bed. Where had she gotten that explanation from? "Have you been watching 'What not to Wear' You know we said no tv on vacation."

She shook her head, her black curls bounced around her face. "Miss Alice told me. She knows everything about fashion! She's a fashion guru!"

"Did she tell you that too?"

"Yep!"

"Here," I handed her the dress, "Go get changed." I handed Beth's hers as well. She looked down at it, thumbing the material lightly.

"What's wrong, baby?" I touched her cheek gently. She looked up at me after a moment.

"Th-There was a man at day care today," she said softly. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up.

_What man? Did he touch my baby? I swear to God, is he laid one finger on her I'll-_ she interrupted my thoughts.

"He was the same man in your photos."

My brow furrowed in confusion, "What photos?"

"The ones Daddy said we weren't suppose to tell you about," her voice trailed off.

"Tell me," I gently urged her.

She took a deep breath before continuing. "When we were at Grandpa Charlie's we were playing in your room and we found some stuff under the floor in your closet."

"And? What did you find?"

"Pictures of this really pretty man. Like out of a fairy tale. You were with him and so was Grandpa Charlie."

My pictures from Christmas. Oh my God, I thought he took them.

"And Jacob saw these?" She looked up at me with wide eyes, my tone was more severe than I meant. "I'm not angry at you, I just want to know if your father knew about them."

She nodded her head, "He said not to tell you. We asked him who it was and he said it didn't matter because the man was dead."

I sighed angrily. I couldn't believe Jacob would not tell me. I remember the time she was talking about. I had heard his lullaby. "Wait, was there a cd too?"

"A cd?" She looked thoughtful, "You mean the shiny frisbee thing?" I nodded my head, "Yeah, we put in the stereo thing. Daddy took it out and made us put everything back."

"So it's still in my old room?"

She nodded. "Yeah," I began to get up from my crouched position when she grabbed my arm, "But is he really dead? I promise, Mommy, this man looked just like him."

I bit my lip. If she saw Edward in the future, how would I explain that? _Wait?! See him in the future?? Mrs. Black, there is no future for you and Edward!_ I scolded myself. "Yes, honey, he really is dead."


	11. PLEASE READ

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

I'm really sorry about not updating guys. . I leave for college this Friday so I've been hanging out with friends while I still can. I hope you all don't hate me. Besides, you have Breaking Dawn to read, right? Oh, please don't make any comments relating to Breaking Dawn. I already know how it ends, but I haven't read it and also some people read reviews and I don't want it ruined for them. Once I get myself oriented at school, I'll begin writing again. So hopefully in four or five days I'll have some time to write another chapter. The orientation schedule will have me slammed for the first couple days. I love you all!!

-DarkWolf


	12. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: I do not own **_**Twilight**_**.**

**A/N: I'm so sorry guys for not having this up sooner. I actually started writing it while in route to college. Everything's been such a whirlwind since I've gotten here. I had a three week Autumn term and now I start Fall term on Monday. I'll try and write as much as I can and see where my schedule lets me update. Maybe we can do a Tuesday and Thursday thing. :-) **

* * *

**EPOV**

The rain splattered against the intricately painted glass windows of the empty restaurant. Esme closed the Boathouse's grill for mine and Bella's meeting. Rosalie was furious with me. Her thoughts were nothing but a torrent of curses and damning Bella for ever moving to Forks. It had been difficult to keep my temper in check.

I knew why she thought Bella was a fool. Not only because she had torn the family a part (although that was my fault, not Bella's) but because of what she risked throwing away. Rosalie was especially infuriated now that she would even think of meeting me. _So what if they belong to a fucking mutt?_ Her voice growled through my head. _She has everything! It's not like she smells him anyways. This is fucking ridiculous! What a self centered moron! She has everything that I would gladly trade my world for and, still, she wants Edward. Can't she just treasure what she has?! _I couldn't find any fault with Rose's logic. It made perfect sense. Why would she throw everything away to be with me? A mortal husband, beautiful children, a normal life. She can grow old and watch her children marry and have children of their own. Why would she ever give that up? I'm not worth that. _She never said she was giving this up, _I reminded myself, _This is just a chance to explain and say a proper good bye. _

I buried my face in my hands while leaning back in the chair. An aggravated sigh l left my lips. What a fool I had been to leave Forks! I should have stayed with her. Then again, she has everything I wanted her to have now. Everything that was my reason for leaving.

I let my head land on the table with a loud thunk. Alice was right. The most I could expect from Bella was friendship. Of course I had fantasies of her running into my arms, kissing me, and confessing her undying love. I'm not a saint by any stretch. It would never happen though. Even though she had only grown more beautiful in the past decade, she had also aged emotionally. Maybe Alice was wrong. Bella had lied. She didn't love me anymore. This meeting was just a time she could tell me that and maybe even thank me for leaving her. Even if it was the truth, the she loves me, it was probably merely the love a friend has for another.

The tears that would never fall brimmed my eyes. As much as I wanted to see her again, I don't think I'd be able to handle a rejection of that magnitude. I'd been sitting in the restaurant for twenty minutes, she still hadn't shown up. Maybe she wasn't coming. That was her form of rejecting me.

Silent sobs threatened to rack through my body so I studied the intricacies of the wood grains in the table. How some would spiral and others would straight. I tried to think of some fancy metaphor for mine and Bella's love to mirror against the patterns in the table. I couldn't find any.

_She's not coming. Her love for me was only a teenager's love for her first beaux. See? It's a good thing I rejected her attempts to become a vampire. She would have regretted it._

Dejectedly, I rose from the table.

**BPOV**

I stood outside the door to the restaurant for at least five maybe ten minutes, covered head to toe in mud and rain. When I had gotten to room 204, I sat on the king sized bed for a good ten minutes before noticing the note beside me. Why did she have to change the location? True, it'd be awkward talking with Edward in bed room, so close to the setting of my many fantasies, past and present, with the leading actor. But now I was late. Really late. So I ran to the restaurant.

Bad idea.

Half way down the sidewalk leading to the restaurant, I tripped. Instead of landing on the sidewalk, I landed in the mud **beside** the sidewalk.

I had dressed so nicely! And, now what? Thanks to Alice, my blue evening gown was ruined, my heels were ruined, my hair, which took me two hours to do, was ruined, and I was pretty sure I had a sprained ankle. Why the hell did I agree to this? My hair was sticking out in all directions and, on top of it all, I was now crying.

_Oh yeah, Bella, great way to meet the love of your life after ten years. Maybe you'll give him a good reminder of why he left! _My mind screamed at me. Shivering from the crying, the nerves, and the rain, I reached for the handle on the solid wood door. My fingers wrapped around it, but I couldn't find the strength to open it. Forget it, I couldn't meet him this way. I can take a sign from God. We weren't meant to be. If we were, he would have never left.

Unexpectedly, the door was wrenched open, taking me with it. I landed with a thud against what felt like marble. But I was smart enough and depressed enough, to know it wasn't. Of course, I should have landed on the ground, but with Edward, it was never the case.

I so badly wanted to look at him but how could I? I could face the facts, I looked bad on most days and now I just looked like shit.

My hands balled up in the fabric of his once white shirt as I continued to look at the ground.

"Bella?" The concern that filled his voice caused sobs to rack my body. The magnitude of my emotion shocked me beyond anything else. How does he think of me?

Slowly, an arm encircled my waist while the other clutched my back and shoulders to him as he eased us to the ground. He tightly held me to him as he rocked us back and forth. Honestly, I can't even remember the sweet nothings he mumbled in my ear. I wish I could, he probably said so much of what I wanted to hear. He absentmindedly stroked my messy hair while placing feather light kisses along my hair line. I don't even know why I was crying. Maybe some of it was self pity, frustration over what had happened that day. Some might have been tears of joy. I don't know. I just remember feeling overwhelmed by it all and finding a safe harbor in his arms.

We stayed on the floor long after my sobs had quieted. I'm pretty sure I clung as tightly to him as he did to me. If it was in my nature, I would say something like 'it was like we could not exist without the other.' But that would be a lie. We could exist without each other. It was a fact, we had done it.

I leaned back from him, my arms loosening their hold on his waist and, instead, resting on his thighs. He, too, loosened his hold, but didn't let go. If I wasn't married, I'd admit that I was elated he didn't let go of me.

"Edward?" I said softly, looking up at him for the first time.

"Hmm?" Was his response. He looked so content. His head which had rested on top of mine, now pressed forehead to forehead since I leaned away. A small smile was on his lips as he breathed deeply. I thought maybe it was because he had to adjust again. But he looked so content, I couldn't help think maybe he was enjoying my presence.

"Please," I pleaded with him. How was I supposed to think coherently with him looking like that? Acting like that? "We need to talk." My voice sounded sterner than I meant for it. He took one last breath before opening his eyes.

"Okay." He leaned back from me. His arms fell from my waist and bracing against the floor instead. "Let's talk." His reply was very unenthusiastic.

* * *

**A/N: Short chapter. Sorry. It's kind of draining writing emotion filled chapters. Haha. Well, now they've met again and will talk. What will happen next? Dun dun dun!**


	13. Chapter 12

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own **_**Twilight.**_

**A/N: Short, and angsty. I'm trying to make it up to you guys for being gone so long.**

**EPOV**

I felt like a bucket of ice had been dropped on my as she said those word. Reluctantly, I pulled away from her. The scenario had been so close to the one of my dreams. Until she said that. Of course I knew we'd have to talk. But, I wished she had some sort of ability too. Some sort of ability allowing her to just understand.

I leaned away from her, placing my hands palms down behind me to support my weight. "Okay," I began, "Let's talk."

Her hair was a complete mess. It stuck in every direction. Some strands were caked in mud, others were holding on to twigs and leaves. Casually, I leaned over and plucked one out of her hair then smoothed the hair back. I took my time, allowing my hand to caress the side of her face. It was one of the many things I had longed to do the last decade.

She brought her hand up. Briefly, I hoped she would take mine in hers, but it was much more painful to watch her push me away.

She shook her head slowly. "No, Edward," she whispered looking down at the ground.

I pulled my hand back, letting it drop to the ground as I silently nodded in agreement.

Her slender shoulders rose and fell as she breathed deeply, prepping herself to talk. "What happened?" Her voice was quivering as she looked up at me. I didn't know what the emotions were. Anger?

"What? What do you mean?"

"I mean," she began, biting down on her lip as she searched for words. Her hands had balled into fists and she abruptly slammed them to the ground as she jumped up. "Agh! What the hell, Edward?"

Shocked would be an understatement. I watched her warily as she paced angrily while I stood up. "What do you mean 'What happened?'"

"What happened!" She repeated. She stuttered in her anger to get the next part out, "Here! Just now!" She marched up to me throwing her hands in my face. "What the fuck, Edward!"

I had no idea how to handle an angry woman. Bella and I had never fought before. I stood rooted to the ground trying to come up with the best way to answer her. "You came to the restaurant. You were upset and crying. So I held you?"

I did not expect a slap to be her response. And it wasn't. It was two slaps. Vaguely, through my surprise, I worried if she hurt herself.

"Stop being an asshole! I meant leaving me! Saying I was a toy to you! Nothing more than a game! What the fuck?" Tears began streaking down her beautiful face as she repeatedly pushed against me with both hands. I wanted nothing more than to wipe them from her eyes and tell her those were all lies. "I worked so hard to come to terms with you not loving me. I moved to Arizona. And went to college. I even got married! And had kids! I worked so hard to avoid everything that reminded me of you. And how I was nothing but a toy to you, when you were so much more to me! You said you didn't love me! That you didn't care what I did with my life." One of her hands cradled her forehead as she gestured angrily with the other. Her wedding band flashed every time she moved. "And then just now," her voice was losing its ferocity and bordered on hysteria. "Acting like you cared? What the hell, Edward? I don't under stand." She shook her head sadly as she slumped against the wall opposite to me. "I know you don't love me," her words ripped through me. How could she believe the lies? "Why couldn't you have just let me alone? I only wanted a vacation."

I was stunned. "Bella," I started out softly, "What I don't understand is how could you have believed me?"

"Because, you know," she hiccupped, "You let me know what you were. Y-you even followed me to Port Angeles. And prom, and killing James to protect me." She shrugged as more tears came, "You made it very easy for me to think you loved me."

I frantically shook my head back and forth. I went to her place at the wall and kneeled in front of her. Bella turned her head to the side, refusing to look at me. I place a hand on either side of beautiful face, gently urging her to turn towards me.

"No, Bella, that's not what I meant." The amount of emotion in my voice surprised me. I wondered if I'd even be able to talk intelligibly. "I meant, how could you believe that I didn't love you?" She stubbornly refused to look up at me. One hand briefly left her face as I brushed back her hair. "Leaving you was the most difficult thing I had ever done. Telling you those lies was one of the most painful. I thought you were more sure of my love for you. That I'd have to lie till kingdom come to dissuade you of it. I never thought it'd be so easy for you to believe the lies and not the truth."

"Why did you leave me though?" She whispered. She slowly brought her eyes to my face.

"Because I couldn't give you everything you deserve," I couldn't look at her. I was petrified I'd lose my composure at any moment. How could she not see? "I can't give you everything_ he_ has. I love you so much, Isabella Marie Swan. I just wanted you to be happy. And you wouldn't have been happy with me."

"How would you know?" She whispered softly before looking up at me.

"Because, you didn't know what you were giving up. Now, you see what you would give up." I brushed away a tear with my thumb. "Please don't cry, Bella. Please," I pleaded quietly with her.

She shoved me away. "No, I don't see," Standing up she glared down at me. "All I see is a self centered, egotistical bastard who never gave me a choice! You forced me to stay human without any choice! It's not seeing what I would have given up. It's now I can't give it up because my daughters are relying on me! You're so insistent on 'knowing what's right for me' that you never even really paid attention to how much thought I gave it!" She shrieked. "I knew what I was doing, Edward! To hell with you saying 

you loved me. At the moment it doesn't even matter whether we love each other or not because now we have no choice!"

"Wh-what do you mean?" Her ferocity had thrown me for a loop. I was having difficulty keeping up with her. Times like these I really hated her being closed to me.

"I mean, whether you love me or whether I love you, doesn't matter anymore!"

"What are you saying, Bella? Of course it matters!"

"No, it doesn't. Thanks to you, it doesn't. You've trapped me, Edward."

"How so?"

"I can't leave Jacob even if I wanted to. I have children now. They change everything. You've trapped me here and our feelings, I fear, are insignificant in deciding our course of action," she stated simply. "I just wish you had given me the choice," she continued softly, "Things would have been so much different."


	14. Chapter 13

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own **_**Twilight.**_

**Author's Note: Alright. Here's what I'm going to do. College is a bitch. So I'm going to try and update as often as I can with shorter chapters. You'd be waiting a couple weeks or so if you wanted a monstrosity of a chapter. And I like to write in one sitting anyways. So, maybe two or even three times a week, I'll try to update with chapters about this length. Maybe a little longer or shorter depending on my muse and such. Does that sound agreeable? :-)**

**BPOV**

Silence enveloped the room with the finality of my revelation. It had been in the back of my mind. Some foreboding feeling that I couldn't shake and didn't know why. Now I knew. It didn't matter that I loved him. If I didn't have the girls…

I shook my head. I loved my girls. Their birth was the most wonderful event in my life after meeting Edward. And that was the problem. If I loved them less, I could leave. But I didn't love them less.

I sat down again against the wall, watching Edward. His normally smooth forehead was creased with wrinkles as his brow furrowed. His topaz eyes suddenly found the floor very interesting. I wish I had his ability. I wanted to know what he was thinking. Was he angry with me? I had lied, it wasn't his fault we were in this situation. It was mine. I could have easily told Jacob no when he proposed.

Edward shoved his hands in the pockets of his slacks before looking up at me. His beautifully messy bronze hair flopped casually over his forehead.

"So," his voice was so quiet I almost missed it, "You don't love him?" He looked so unsure of himself. Like a boy telling a girl he likes her for the first time.

The question caught me off guard. Didn't _he _just accuse _me_ of being unsure of _his _love? All this time he was doubting mine?

"Of course, I love Jacob," Edward's expression fell. I thought I could see tears in his eyes, "But not

like he deserves. I don't love him the way a wife would. The way I should. "

My eyes drifted to the floor. I felt completely numb after everything that had happened. Soothing vacation my ass. This was a nightmare. Tears welled up in my eyes. I was so tired of everything. How could it all get so messed up?

I leaned forward, placing my head on Edward's shoulder. "I'm so tired, Edward," I squeezed my eyes shut as the tears refused to back down. "Why didn't you just stay gone? You did it for _ten years_ couldn't you have lasted for two weeks?"

He turned his head toward me, his cool breath tickled my ear. "Do you want me gone?" The hurt was evident in his voice. He made no move to hold me and I moved my hand to rest on his thigh.

Weakly, I shook my head. "No, it's too late for that. "

"No, it's not. I can go. It will be as if-"

"Shut up," I never wanted to hear those words ever pass his lips again. "It's too late. You can't leave now. " I didn't want him to go. Here he was. After a decade, here he was. And with me. My hands move to his waist, clinging to the hem of his shirt. "Please," my voice quaked as I begged, "I love you. Don't leave me again."

With vampire speed, he scooped me up in to his lap, clutching me desperately to him. He placed frantic kisses across my forehead, whispering "I love you" between each kiss.

Instinctively, my hands ran up his chest and around his neck before becoming buried in his hair. Our lips touched the moment I moved to look up at him. As cliché as it is, I felt a bolt of electricity pass between us. Ten years of pain and loneliness evaporated instantly. I was a younger me, a happier me. I felt alive. My heart could beat again. I vaguely remember him moaning into our kiss. I took the opportunity and slipped my tongue between his lips. For the first time, he didn't resist me. His taste was the best taste. It was better than Godiva Chocolate. Better than the sweetest pineapple or strawberry. Better than the world's greatest cheesecake.

Our kiss was interrupted as I sharply inhaled when a gust of cold wind hit my back. Edward slowly peeled the dress off my shoulders. I hadn't the faintest memory of him unzipping my dress. His movement stopped as he gauged my reaction. His eyes smoldered with love and lust and apprehension. One of my hands moved down from his neck, covering his hand on my left shoulder as I helped him push down the material.

His lips crashed in to me before he pressed his forehead against mine. I almost got lost in the beautiful amber sea of his eyes. "Are you sure, Bella?"

_Are you sure, Bella?_

Was I? Could I cheat on my husband? The gravity of the situation closed in on me. Could I live with myself after this? I despised women who cheated on their husbands. I thought of them as cheap whores and liars. Was I a hypocrite? Could I lie to Jacob? My daughters?

Edward may not have been able to read my mind, but he could read my face. Just like I could read his. His jaw was clenched as he took a shuddering unneeded breath.

"Edward, I-" My voice was quaking with tears as I wanted to explain to him, but he cut me off.

"You don't have to explain, love," He put on a half hearted smile that didn't reach his eyes. "I'm so sorry," he shook his head sadly before leaning it on my shoulder. "You're right. This is all my fault," he whispered, turning his head and gently kissing the base of my neck. My arms wrapped around him comfortingly.

I didn't know what to tell him. It was his fault. He left me. But he shouldn't be beating himself over it. Wasn't us being a part for eternity punishment enough? He didn't need to continuously guilt himself over it when he's already suffering.

"I love you," I whispered. I ran my hands through his messy hair as my tears silently came. We would never be together. I couldn't leave Jacob and make the girls suffer through a divorce. It wouldn't be fair to them. I couldn't cheat on Jacob because he didn't deserve that and I was not a hypocrite. "I love you," I said again as I kissed the top of his head.

"I love you, too," he whispered, clinging to me again. "What are we going to do, Bella?"

Hearing him ask me that was one of the most lowest times of my life. He didn't even know what we were going to do. I wouldn't cheat on or leave Jacob. But I never wanted Edward to leave again. What were going to do?

I slowly shook my head. "I don't know, Edward."

"Can we see each other?"

"What?" I thought he understood I wasn't going to cheat on Jacob. I sighed, "Edward, I can't cheat on him."

"That's not what I meant." He lifted his head to look at me. "I meant can I see you. Maybe Take you out to lunch every now and then. I can't handle being without you again, Bella." His lids covered his eyes as he thought for a moment. His jaw tightened before opening his eyes again and resumed talking. "Even-" his normally smooth voice was husky, "Even if we can only be friends. I need to be with you Bella."


End file.
